[FIC] Life would be perfect if we had these

Title: Life would be perfect if we had these
Characters: Donghae, Hyukjae, Kibum
Rating: G
Wordcount: 3.145
Summary: Life is not what it used to be and as he starts to pick up the pieces, he wants to go back more and more.
A/N: So this concludes my newest one-shot which I have spent a few days on writing. Many thanks to my betareader for keeping up with me (all the way until the last part even) and for being awesome cuddling material. This was inspired by the picture below and I kind of had the ending vaguely in my head as I wrote. I know many of you might still have a lot of questions, but for this story, this is all it gets. I am thinking of possibly writing more stories in this verse but that's not yet a given. We'll see where this alternate world takes my plot bunnies in the following days. ^.^

Life is a fast-forward through the boring things and a pause or occasional rewind at the things that we are not willing to let go of yet.

Life is stopping to take a break from it all, breathing in and out before pressing play again and letting the things flash by once more.

Life is buttons to use at our own will, twists and turns when we want them to be there only, no more surprises.

Life is lifeless.

Rewind to the first time – and I felt it coming

Walking through the hallways, there’s a lot of things that remind him of the past. He mostly remembers laughter and sore sides from all the elbowing. A few tiny holes in the wall show where once the announcements used to be; huge, bright coloured papers with information about coming events or parties. And every semester a huge list of school grades. They’re not there anymore, because no one sees them anymore these days, no one cares.

It’s been a few years now, he thinks, or maybe it’s been one year only, but it feels like a long time for sure. People have stopped looking at the announcements, stopped looking at anything at all, in fact. Sometimes it feels like he’s the only one still able to see, while everyone else walks around blind with their eyes open. It’s sad, because there’s so many beautiful things that they miss out on.

It’s not hard to recall the first time it happened. Or well; the first time it happened to someone around him. They used to be three. Siwon, Hyukjae and Donghae. They used to be friends. They used to know each other better than they knew themselves. But then the Revolution came and everything changed. They changed. Or at least the other two did. He likes to think he hasn’t changed that much so far. But who knows? There’s no one left to tell him.

What he remembers the clearest is the day Hyukjae changed. Sure, Siwon had been first, but the tall one had always been more serious than them, more able to be absorbed by work and focused on what was supposed to be right. He and Hyukjae on the other hand, they lived life mostly as if it were nothing but a game. They loved teasing, playing, toying around. Rules were mere guidelines, as Hyukjae would often say, not things you should unconditionally abide by.

He should’ve seen it coming, really. Perhaps in some way he actually did, but he was too shocked to admit it to himself. There was no chance on denial left when it happened, however. Just like that, over the weekend, he lost his best friend to the void. Sure, Hyukjae left a mail, telling him of the choice he’d made and the exact reason why he made it, but black letters on a computer screen did not bring life back to the blank eyes that stared straight ahead during class.

He still remembers the ‘Think about it, Hae, no more boring classes to sit through!’ that ended the mail, completely cutting through what he had thought was understanding.

Press pause on life – what’s missing was you

The Revolution is not an uproar of sorts, nor a protest. No one got hurt during the Revolution. There wasn’t even any fighting involved. The Revolution is the name they have given to the period of time in which the world gradually changed. At least the people changed. The Revolution stands for the select few months after the invention of Go!Stop, the watch-like device with the power to control time.

The advertisement campaigns were enormous; be able to really control your life now, get Go!Stop. That and other nonsensical slogans were to be found on every street corner, as if that would attract the people. Well, it apparently did, because in the span of four months, pretty much everyone who could and couldn’t afford it had gotten themselves a Go!Stop. Some people even went as far as making huge debts to buy the little machine.

He hadn’t seen the charm of it and honestly; he still doesn’t see it. What’s so good about the thing really? People are able to control time now, but what do they win with it? Sure, there’s no more boring classes to sit through as Hyukjae stated it, but there’s also no fun things happening to brighten up those boring classes. People don’t have to do the things they don’t like anymore, but in the end they also miss out on a lot of the fun in their lives.

Most people have lost their sense of time too. It is not rare for him to see couples on the street panicking because they think half a day has passed already, when it is really only an hour later. Everyone is so used to fast-forwarding through life that they don’t even know anymore what it’s like to actually live through a whole day. It wouldn’t surprise him if he is the only person left who still knows what seconds are and what they are used for.

But what saddens him most about it all, is that just because he chose not to use the revolutionary invention, he is left completely alone. His parents use it too, and the few moments they’re not messing with time when he’s around, they’re trying to convince him of the good things about the device. It’s sad to realise that the last time he really laughed is so long ago he doesn’t even remember the sound. There’s nothing fun about laughing when no one else laughs or smiles along with him.

Sometimes he wants to buy himself one of those machines and rewind time until he’s back in the world he used to know. Sometimes he just wants to see the smile on his friends’ faces one more time.

Play me that song – I like to think there’s someone there

He rounds the corner and steps into a new hallway, easily finding his way to the classroom he needs to be at. It has become a daily routine for him now; going to class, paying attention to the teachers, studying at home. It wouldn’t surprise him if he’s the only one left to still consciously take in what he’s being taught as he writes down his notes. Everyone else is blanking through the hours of school and will probably only press play again once they’re home or out with their friends.

The only thing people still press play for are evening’s out or days together with their beloved ones, really. And even then, some look just as blank as ever. Sometimes he sits down on a bench in the middle of the city and just watches the people pass by. He pays close attention to their eyes mostly, hoping to see someone consciously walking around and not just moving on automatic pilot, but it’s a lost cause.

If he’s really honest to himself; he gave up hope on finding someone like him a long time ago anyway. Maybe he lost that hope when he lost Hyukjae to the void, or maybe he’s just trying too hard to keep the past alive. There’s times when he wonders if maybe this is how it is supposed to be and maybe he should be getting himself a Go!Stop too. But then he sees the lifeless robots it made out of his friends and family and decides against it. He still wonders why they don’t see it themselves, though.

When the teacher steps in, another uninteresting class starts – everything has become even more boring now that he has to sit through it alone – and he gets out his books to follow along. Yet something is different today. Something he can’t quite pinpoint. His eyes land on one of his classmates more to the front; messy black hair and the beginnings of a beard darkening his cheeks, but there’s nothing special about him, staring straight ahead like all the others.

Until the guy suddenly turns his head and looks straight at him. And then smiles. And gets up. And walks over to him. He’s pretty sure his mouth is hanging open. He’s also quite convinced he shouldn’t be scaring off the only other person who consciously sits through classes, but he can’t help it. His eyes wander over the other’s appearance, searching, looking for something that will indicate it’s a dream. He expects the other to either disappear or go blank anytime soon, but there’s a spark of life in those eyes that he hasn’t seen in ages and he’s strangely reassured.

It triggers something inside of him, that spark, tugs at his heartstrings and makes him almost instantly scoot over so the other would fit next to him at the desk. He’s still surprised when the guy actually sits down and the sudden increase in weight makes the bench dent a little.

Stop and stare – then you tear me all apart

Kibum is about the same age as him, just moved into the big city. They click almost immediately and before class is over they’re already throwing paper balls at the other students, hitting them square on the back of their heads. They laugh through half the explanation the teacher is giving and no one gives a damn, because no one is consciously aware of it anyway. Perhaps when they’ll press play later on, they’ll realise exactly what they’ve missed out on, but he doesn’t care.

When the bell rings, they’re out the door in a blink, talking about soccer, video games and cars, and how the world was much brighter before its population turned into zombies. From there they set into a debate about the successfulness of using holy water against zombies. Kibum turns out to really be on the same wavelength as him and the interactions come easily. They even throw over someone’s bike trying to get to the gate, but don’t really notice it. No one else does either.

As they step out of the school grounds, he slings an arm around Kibum’s shoulder and asks a stupid question. Kibum gives a stupid answer before they look at each other. The next moment he’s laughing so hard he trips over his own feet and stumbles forward. A hand catches his wrist, however, keeps him from planting himself face first into the ground, and he’s pretty sure he knows that grip. There’s a familiarity to the way the fingers cup around his wrist, fingertips barely joining together at the bridge of his hand.

He turns around to look straight into a pair of dark eyes in a familiar face, framed by locks of red hair. To his right, Kibum’s laughter has died away, but he can’t look away from the face to see what the reason for that is. A split moment later the eyes go from blank to filled with emotions and he knows, he just knows, that Hyukjae stopped time on him. When the hint of a smile appears on the redhead’s face, he pulls free before the other can say anything and turns away with a mumbled ‘thank you’ as he easily walks off with Kibum.

He doesn’t look back no matter how much he wants to, but instead continues the conversation where it had left off and brings a smile to Kibum’s face again almost immediately. There’s sympathy in Kibum’s expression, understanding in the way the younger guy wraps his arm almost protectively around his middle. He blurts out something stupid before he can stop himself and then they’re back to the zombie debate, where Kibum suggests that maybe guns would be better after all.

He gets home at some time after midnight – having spent his evening at Kibum’s place – and drops down on his bed mere minutes later. He cries well into the morning over a lost friend, but even though he looks like a zombie himself when he gets up, he doesn’t skip school. Because he knows he has a new friend waiting there now.

Living in fast forward – I’ll make it worth my time

When they graduate a month later, they’re both smiling. Kibum probably even brighter than he is, as the younger has always been a little insecure about passing. They share a drink on the school roof and throw their uniforms all the way down to the ground. It’s wonderful to go down the stairs like a model, a bunny and their Physics teacher, but the best part is stealing the school’s headmaster’s bike and never getting caught for it. When they dump it near a playground, no one sees them, and they go home laughing.

He’s surprised to find his parents both on normal time when he comes home. Even more surprised when they ask about his grades. He doesn’t complain, though, and makes good use of the opportunity instead. They talk about school, studies and future plans. He’s halfway his explanation about knowing astrological science and finding a cure for cancer when his father remembers something. A trip to his parents’ bedroom later, he holds a box in his hands filled with pictures from back then up to now.

At first glance, he sees that there’s lots of Hyukjae and Siwon. His parents look at him like they’re expecting something, but he doesn’t feel anything – or just doesn’t want to. Instead, he sends them a forced smile and takes the box upstairs with him. When he comes back down, his parents are still there, consciously aware of it too, and he feels like he can take on the world for at least a day longer now. They continue their conversation well into the evening, after which they watch a documentary about wild animals in Africa or something until they all go to bed.

At two in the morning, he wakes up because of his phone receiving a text message. It’s a number he doesn’t know, but when he opens it, he immediately realises who it’s from. ‘Congratulations, Hae’ still dances in front of his eyes when he closes them moments later, the nickname haunting him into his sleep where he keeps seeing flashes of red hair and a gummy smile. The rest of his holidays he spends with Kibum, doing things that every eighteen year old boy should be doing during holidays.

He’s happy, for as far a person can be happy in this world. He has a friend who thinks like him, parents who spend a little more time on him and he’s planning to get himself a dog sometime soon. Life is almost to be called nice. Somewhere halfway the holidays he signs up for one of the many universities that offer medical studies. He’s accepted the next day, but waits with telling until Kibum announces he got accepted too. They celebrate accordingly with their first shared bottle of Soju and a huge hangover the next day. When he drops into bed that evening, he’s convinced life has finally taken a turn for the right.

Two months into university, he loses Kibum to the void when the younger desperately needs to get a job and they all require the use of Go!Stop. He’s dazed for a week, listless for a month and then takes out his watch for the first time in years.

Reset the moment – I don’t want to regret losing you

“Hey, Hae!” a voice calls him and he turns around to look at the owner, a smile instantly relaxing his features upon seeing the redhead. The next moment there’s an arm slung around his shoulders and Hyukjae’s MP3 is stuffed under his nose. He knows what will come next, has seen it plenty of times, but he waits for it anyway, waits for those words to fill his hearing up again.

“Imagine, life would be perfect if we had these!” Hyukjae exclaims, pointing at the buttons on the device. “We’d skip right through boring classes and move on to sports lessons or something fun like that.” He smiles sparsely as he recalls an infinite amount of years spent on watching people grow cold. The words take him back to a moment so many years ago for him and yet one that actually never happened before, a moment in which Hyukjae said those same words and he made it his goal to create a device that would make that wish become reality.

He sees now how stupid it was for him to think that people would actually have any use for it. Sure, there’s stupid times in life, but they are exactly what make the good times all the better. He will never forget the few months he spent in Kibum’s company. After being alone for so long, they definitely taught him how much one should value the small things in life. Somehow, he suddenly realises, he’s even glad he was able to experience those years.

He lets out a laugh then, smacking the back of Hyukjae’s head and running off before the redhead can take revenge for it. Moments later Hyukjae jumps on his back and he stumbles forward but doesn’t fall. He turns around and Hyukjae holds on tighter, refusing to be thrown off like that. He laughs more then. When he finally wrestles the redhead off of his back, it only takes a moment before the roles are switched.

“Hey Hyuk.” he says, making said person turn his head to try and look at him. The redhead fails terribly at it, which makes him chuckle and ruffle his friend’s hair. “It’s nice to see you.” he then says as he tightens his grip on the other’s T-shirt. Hyukjae snorts, does a crazy dance and then trips over his own feet. They both end up rolling over the ground, scraping their palms and jeans without care.

“You’re weird.” Hyukjae states then. “Which is to be expected from a genius like you. Why haven’t you time travelled into the future yet? With your brain you should be able to.” There’s so much he wants to say to that, but instead he presses a handful of grass in the other’s mouth with a wide grin. The next moment Siwon reaches them, rolling his eyes at their antics, but smiling anyway. They exchange their lunch menus for the day as they set off to the roof of the building. He makes a mental note to find out Kibum’s address and pay him a visit, just because.

He tried many times to go back, to rewind time back to before everything started, only to find that it was useless, that he could never get to before his invention. He doesn’t care that it took him five years to make, he’s simply glad that he found a way to create a reset button and turn everything back to how it was supposed to be.