Title: Calendar
Characters: Leeteuk
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.256
Summary: He lives his life by the names and dates that are written on his Calendar.
A/N: Well.. I really have no explanation for this. Perhaps it has a deep meaning, perhaps it does not. Perhaps it is a sad story, perhaps it is not. All in all, this story talks about friendship and depending on your friends to get through the day. This story talks about wrongs, rights, colour codes and obnoxious glitter. This story talks about the insanity that is my mind.
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He doesn’t count with months, like normal people do. He counts with names, dates, drawings. He counts the days until the next name, the next event, the next big thing. There’s empty slots that he fills up with memories or future plans, but in the end it still all comes down to those names.
The year starts with Sungmin, scribbled over the line in hasty stripes and circles, a distant memory of the only time he ever let Hyukjae write something for him. It’s tiny, nothing more than a scribble, and he remembers all too well the first few months when he had to repeatedly ask the lanky younger what he had written there again. But Sungmin is pretty much the only one at the start of the year, so it didn’t take too long to know it was him.
Next up comes Kangin. A bunch of roughly drawn lines that are too big for the little square of the seventeenth. There’s not much to say about this date, because everything will be said on the day itself. Kangin is like that; straightforward. He vaguely remembered a very enthusiastic trainee grabbing a pen and drawling his name all over square seventeen of the first month, just because ‘He thought it’d look pretty there. And also a little because hyung had to buy him something good.’
A big paragraph is the next one; a long week of names, words and numbers. Kyuhyun reminding him that Valentine is not his birthday - far from it even - and Heechul taking up half the month just to write Hankyung on the ninth on one of his drunken evenings. Siwon’s name is scribbled somewhere next to it, a pencil arrow to the tenth of the month, another pencil arrow pointing out of the paper. The kid’s two birthdays have always been confusing. Half of his friends claim it should be in February, the other half claim it should not be. He merely wishes Siwon a happy birthday on both dates to keep everyone happy.
It’s empty for a while then, a whole month even, but luckily it’s not silent. Usually Kyuhyun nags at him that his computer is getting old, even though he just got a new one on his birthday, and Kangin mutters annoyed lines that mostly come down to ‘Hyung, you need to live, get out more often. You’re so boring!’ Not that he pays much attention to it, but it does keep him from thinking of other things too much.
April’s a busy month again. Well it shouldn’t be, but Heechul’s one of those people who thinks Siwon’s birthday is better in April, so once again half the month is taken by the diva’s huge writing – he even suspects the use of glitter pens for the name – and the second part of the arrow that left the month February before. But Sungmin was there first, having jotted down Hyukjae’s name on the fourth as a thank you for his celebratory loner position at the start of the year. A while later Zhou Mi came and someone wrote the few Korean signs beneath Siwon’s glittery name, a modest little arrow signing it should be on the nineteenth, which was totally covered in glitter.
He’s more fond of May than of March, because at least May has nice weather, mother’s day sometimes, and a select few drops of happy to keep his world going round. May also brings new TV programs, time to think over new career travels and a distinct sense of belonging. May gives hope and smiles, Ryeowook’s compositions and Yesung’s singing in the shower. May grows flowers, brings up young animals and nurtures love. May is beautiful.
And then comes June, which is Ryeowook’s month. Literally, as every single member of the band has taken their time to draw something around Ryeowook’s name. There’s animals, music instruments, a series of things that may or may not connect to the boy, but everyone agrees it’s a pretty work of art. They’re proud of themselves for what they have made together. He’s proud of them too, for more reasons than just the Calendar art.
July is noisy, as much as text can be noisy. Heechul didn’t stick to a little glitter, no, the whole page is glitter. For as far as it’s not pink. His own name lies forgotten somewhere under the upper left leg of the H in Heechul’s name, but he’s fine with that. Heechul’s birthday is the highlight of the year, usually. Because Heechul doesn’t let his birthday pass just like that. Heechul wants gifts and fun and alcohol. Heechul demands for people to have fun, not just on his birthday, but the whole month long, and somehow he doesn’t find it hard to agree to fun.
He realises every year again how the second eldest has pretty much monopolised his calendar when August comes. As if Hankyung, Siwon and Heechul aren’t written obnoxiously enough already, it seems as if the diva has made it his life goal to make sure Kibum’s birthday would never be forgotten. Big, small and rectangular arrows in every colour of the rainbow – from red to violet – are pointing at the modestly written name to make sure it gets noticed. Yesung’s name almost disappears in the group of arrows, but luckily Kibum was kind enough to write his hyung’s name in black marker, so it could never be hidden. Not that he would forget either birthday; they’re both too precious to him for that anyway.
Shindong comes in September, finally a name that he wrote on his calendar himself. The always down-to-earth boy with a sense of humour that could make him smile and even laugh at any moment. He wrote the name there because he ruefully had to admit that sometimes he did forget that date, if only because it just was an unexpected one. But now he doesn’t anymore. He knows perfectly well when it’s the happy kid’s birthday and he makes sure to have something ready; a gift, a greeting, anything. Shindong takes everything with a smile. Shindong makes him smile.
The little one comes in October, the shaky, maknae-written Korean that spells out something that probably should be Henry but now really says ‘Heogli.’ He never had the heart to change it, because the youngest had looked so proud when he wrote it - his first Korean word. A few days later it all ends with Donghae, two signs that signal the end of his year and the start of the toughest period. But Donghae’s birthday is emotional, because the kid always cries at first and then Hyukjae and Kibum make him laugh again. Maybe Shindong is in it too for a small part. Maybe Donghae just has mood swings.
He’s a little scared of what comes after Donghae. Scared of the three empty papers that are completely blank. Sure, he’s got other calendars filled with names; family, friends, distant acquaintances, but to him the last three months of the year are blank. They are hard times, cold winters, sleepless nights. He hates them and yet needs them, for he isn’t able to smile every single year like Shindong can.
But at least he knows that when December comes to an end, there will be hasty scribbles waiting for him when he turns the page. He always turns the page, and makes it a new beginning. Another year of names and dates. Another year of smiles and fun and obnoxious glitter. Another year lived by his calendar.
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