Title: What's in a name: Hangeng
Characters: Hangeng
Rating: G
Wordcount: 502
Summary: He knew the feeling of being ‘less’ than others.
A/N: I wrote the first drabble (which was Leeteuk's) on the 8th of May and since then have gradually written the others as well. It is one drabble a member. There are no plotlines, this is basically my positive fangirl view on what goes on in their minds I guess, and I just really enjoyed writing these out, although it sometimes was a major battle.
- - - - -
He knew the feeling of being ‘less’ than others.
After all, he had lived through a lot of bad conditions himself. He knew what it felt like to be a nobody when you were supposed to be somebody. He knew what it was like to be completely and utterly lost, all by yourself in a foreign place where people even spoke a language you didn’t understand at all. But he had been lucky, right? There had been people who had taken his side, who had fought together with him, and he had made it through.
No one could tell him what to do anymore now. He had learned to live free, to be himself and not care about what others said or did. He was a caught bird that was finally let out into the world again. Sometimes he really wondered how his friends could still bear living the life they were living, without being crushed by all the pressure. It sure felt great for him to be able to do what he wanted to do without having a management or company boss control his every step. But there was something else as well..
Guilt.
Every time he saw them on TV, every time he read an article about them, every time his mind was flooded by memories of them, he could feel it take hold if his intestines and squeeze them until he almost physically felt pain because of it. He felt like a traitor for leaving them, and the fact that he couldn’t even call them to see if they were alright or to reassure them he was fine wasn’t really helping either. Especially not when his best friend left heartbreaking messages all over the internet.
No, he wasn’t one to shrug off the friendship he had gotten from the members and leave without a single thought about them. No matter how much he smiled when he was out in the open, no matter how much activities he did without them, they were always on his mind, somewhere in the back of his head. Especially when he stood on stage alone, he felt the absence of twelve or six others that should normally accompany him. Singing by himself was strange, yet exciting at the same time, and he didn’t know which of those two feelings should be more prominent.
Going away and leaving everyone behind had been hard, but he hadn’t been able to do anything else. Even though his character was soft, he had to push through until the end. No matter what the outcome would be, he was going to try his best to become a free man. That way, he could meet up with his dear friends again with more relaxed surroundings and they would be able to stay friends forever. That was something he certainly wasn’t going to let go of; the fourteen boys who had become something much like family to him over the years and had taken up a major place in his heart?
Showing posts with label hangeng. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hangeng. Show all posts
Tuesday, 30 August 2011
Monday, 29 August 2011
[FIC] Just for one night
Title: Just for one night
Characters: Hangeng, Heechul
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 1.934
Summary: Hangeng visits just for one night, Heechul disagrees
A/N: My friend came over for a few days, we got to role-playing some Hanchul while lying in bed. (We were supposed to fall asleep early, but it didn't turn out as expected. I think I fell asleep at around 4AM, still in the middle of the RPG.) We had a little co-starring by my cat Lyntia, but that's about it. It's squishy, it's not really plotline-ish.. Probably just fluff without plut? Or something to the likes of that. Hanchul without plot? Enjoy either way.
- - - - -
Heechul lay in silence on the bed, staring into the dark that surrounded him from all sides. There was a sudden shadow popping up right in front of him, but before he could back away in fright, a loud, happy purring was to be heard and he smiled with a sigh.
“Baengshin-ah.. Don’t be such a creeper.” he murmured to the cat, poking its nose softly with one finger. The only reply was a lick on his finger after which the cat calmly made its way to the pillow to lie down there and go to sleep. Something, he realized, he should do as well to be fit the next day. Yet somehow sleep didn’t sound all that interesting.
Right at that moment, the person behind him suddenly turned a little and an arm was strategically laid over him. He huffed and pushed it off of him, but moments later it was put back. The sound of the other’s calm breathing was rather entrancing and the warm air blown against his neck every time felt more reassuring than anything had done in the past nine months. He let out an annoyed groan, but snuggled closer against the warm body behind him anyway.
“Tell me again why you have to leave?” he wondered out loud, putting his hand on top of the other’s. There was a short silence before the answer came, softly and almost hesitantly.
“Because I have a concert tomorrow.”
He could only huff again when hearing those words. “Cancel it.”
“And disappoint my fans? I can’t do that. They all paid for their tickets and expect me to come.” the other mumbled, causing him to sigh deeply.
“I’m sure they won’t’ mind you postponing your concert. They can wait a little longer.” he protested, but the other chuckled amusedly.
“I have to go, Chul. My plane is at seven, I have to get up at five to catch it.” the reply then came, followed by a soft sigh from the other as if talking about it seemed to make him remember the crappiness of the whole situation.
“Five? But that’s like..three hours from now.” Heechul muttered in protest.
“Yes. All the more reason to shut up and get the last few hours we can get.” the smile was obvious in his voice as he said those words, after which he turned a little to position himself better and then rested his chin on Heechul’s shoulder.
“I don’t want to sleep. When I wake up you will be gone. I don’t want you to be gone.” the latter said to that statement, his voice slightly whiny. There came no immediate reply and in the silence that followed, Heechul wondered if the other had fallen asleep, but suddenly Hangeng moved closer to him and muzzled their cheeks together.
“I will come back tomorrow.” he then promised, smiling lightly.
“Yeah, sure. You said that last time too. ‘I will be back soon.’ But I didn’t see you for nine freaking months, you moron.” Heechul immediately contradicted those words.
“Well I was incredibly busy, Chul. Besides, I told you I would come back, yes, but I never said how long it would take. This is my last concert and I took some free time without schedules, so I’ll be back tomorrow.”
The silence that followed showed how much Heechul believed those words. Before anyone could say anything, however, a certain cat woke up again and decided that three in the morning was the best time to go hyperactive without warning. So they both nearly rolled out of the bed in shock when suddenly a cat jumped on the covers and started attacking everything that moved - or moved just in his mind. It took some time for their suddenly erratic heartbeats to slow down again.
“You know you could have at least called or something. I don’t need you to appear at my doorstep, but a call at least?” Heechul continued the conversation softly once that was the case.
“I called. You just didn’t pick up.” Hangeng immediately contradicted, making Heechul frown and then feel slightly guilty, glad that the Chinese man could not see his face in the dark.
“You have to text me first, I’m busy.” he snapped, but he knew the other saw right through the façade and the lies. He wasn’t surprised when the answer that followed had completely nothing to do with the matter at hand.
“You’re an idiot.” Hangeng told him in such a way that made it clear he was not angry about the little lie but more amused and maybe even thinking it full-out laughable. Heechul didn’t even need a second to give an answer; “Yes that too.”
Hangeng smiled over those words, resting his head a little closer next to Heechul’s. There was another one of their silence, before he patted Heechul’s hand. “Go to sleep.” he then mumbled.
“I don’t want to sleep. I’ll stay awake until five and then make you stay here.” the elder protested with no humour whatsoever in his voice.
“Fine.” Hangeng calmly replied. “Do as you please, but I’m going to catch some sleep now.” He closed his eyes, but obviously didn’t really expect to be left alone to sleep by Heechul, as he merely lay waiting until the other would talk again. Meanwhile, Baengshin had given up on his hyperactivity again and calmly walked up to the pillow to lie down again right above their heads. It was when his belly touched the fabric, that Heechul spoke again.
“Tell me again why you have to get up at five..?” he mumbled, eyes closed but still very much awake and completely engulfed in thoughts about his friend’s flight from the next day.
“I have a concert tomorrow.” Hangeng replied with a sigh, knowing that he should have expected the question coming from his friends.
“What time?” the latter immediately inquired to know.
“Five in the evening.”
“Who goes to a concert at five in the evening?” Heechul rolled his eyes as he said those words, thinking the timing pretty stupid.
“Apparently lots of people because it’s sold out.” the younger immediately retorted, sounding slightly annoyed. “But it starts at eight. Only I have to be there at five.”
“Then why do you have to go at five in the morning? Sleep a little longer.” Heechul grumbled, untouched by the annoyed sound of the other’s voice. He lifted his hand and stroked the cat above his head a little. His actions earned him a loud purring almost right next to his ear.
“Because I wasn’t supposed to be here from the start. I didn’t even tell anyone I was coming here.” Hangeng sighed, slightly starting to think that maybe it had been wiser not to show up in Korea at all. Then again, he had promised to come back, so there was no way he could’ve stayed away forever. One day he would have had to face Heechul’s wrath anyway, so better now than later, when it would have been even worse.
“Oh, so soon you’ll get a call from your manager asking where the hell you are?” the elder sounded almost as if he was looking forward to that, but Hangeng shook his head, even though Heechul couldn’t see that.
“No.” he replied, leaving a short silence before continuing. “I turned off my phone.”
Another silence ensued and Heechul found himself wondering why the hell Hangeng showed up at eleven in the evening just to spend a night of sleep in Heechul’s bed and then leave again at five in the morning. He was still in the middle of thinking bad things when Hangeng softly took hold of his hand and intertwined their fingers.
In the following minutes they didn’t speak anymore again, but Heechul felt how Hangeng softly squeezed his hand and snuggled closer to him. A small smile appeared on his face and he slowly pulled his fingers out of Hangeng’s grasp. Yet even before he had the chance to pull away his hand completely, it was already taken hold of again and Hangeng intertwined their fingers once more. There was a slight battle of wills going on between them, before Hangeng kind of won when Heechul decided to let their hands be clasped together.
“How have things been, Chullie?” the Chinese man slowly asked, caressing the other’s hand with his thumb.
“Fine.” Heechul replied rather coldly. “I learned Chinese.”
“Ni hao. Wo shi Hangeng, ni shi Xi Che.” the soft voice immediately told him, making him chuckle slightly at the still only slightly familiar sound of the Chinese and his Chinese name. “I missed you.” Hangeng then softly added to his words, much less joking then before.
“I didn’t miss you. At all.” Heechul coldly replied, but there was a smile on his face. And he still smiled as he turned his head a little to the other to be able to catch a glimpse of the Chinese man’s face. The movement merely earned him another cheek-muzzle, which proved to him that Hangeng didn’t believe a word of what he was saying.
“You’re ruining my perfect skin.” he therefore complained half heartedly to his friend.
“You sound like such a moron, Heechul. You’re complaining like an ahjumma. Or maybe you’re more of a noona. You do look like one. My noona.” the latter then told him with a soft laugh. Heechul scoffed, but felt a slight bit of amusement at those words.
“You are such an idiot.” He said with a hint of that same amusement in his voice.
“I am your idiot, my noona.” Hangeng went on joking, causing Heechul to pull his hand out of Hangeng’s completely and swat his leg. Yet the other seemed to have seen that coming, because there were arms wrapped around him again immediately and he was pulled closer against the Chinese man’s chest a mere second later.
Right at that moment, a rather stalker-like Baengshin placed himself right in their middle, pushing its head against Heechul’s shoulder and practically stuffing its butt in Hangeng’s face. The latter merely pulled one arm free and moved the cat back to the pillow.
“Ah Baengshin.. I know you never really liked me, but this is really too much.” he sighed.
“What are you talking about? Baengshin just loves you! Heebum is the one who can’t stand you.” Heechul retorted amusedly. His words caused the younger to snort slightly.
“He even holds part of my name. Ungrateful cat. Much like his owner..” He let a few seconds pause between those words and the next. “..my noona.”
Heechul’s soft laugher made Hangeng smile as well and he wrapped his arm around the other’s middle again, snuggling as close as possible and resting his head against Heechul’s back. It didn’t take long for him to sink away into a hard-needed sleep after he closed his eyes, leaving Heechul awake all by himself to ponder over everything for a long time.
The next morning woke him with a lot of movement to his left. “Good morning.” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes to get rid of the sleep. There was an angry sound coming from next to him.
“Good close to noon, you mean? It’s eleven. My alarm clock didn’t work.” Hangeng then said, obviously a little more awake already than he was himself. He lay in silence for a while longer before a smile tugged up the corners of his mouth.
“Or maybe someone turned it off.” he said amusedly. A short astonished silence followed, before the arm around his middle was pulled away.
“YAH HEECHUL YOU….!!!”
Characters: Hangeng, Heechul
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 1.934
Summary: Hangeng visits just for one night, Heechul disagrees
A/N: My friend came over for a few days, we got to role-playing some Hanchul while lying in bed. (We were supposed to fall asleep early, but it didn't turn out as expected. I think I fell asleep at around 4AM, still in the middle of the RPG.) We had a little co-starring by my cat Lyntia, but that's about it. It's squishy, it's not really plotline-ish.. Probably just fluff without plut? Or something to the likes of that. Hanchul without plot? Enjoy either way.
- - - - -
Heechul lay in silence on the bed, staring into the dark that surrounded him from all sides. There was a sudden shadow popping up right in front of him, but before he could back away in fright, a loud, happy purring was to be heard and he smiled with a sigh.
“Baengshin-ah.. Don’t be such a creeper.” he murmured to the cat, poking its nose softly with one finger. The only reply was a lick on his finger after which the cat calmly made its way to the pillow to lie down there and go to sleep. Something, he realized, he should do as well to be fit the next day. Yet somehow sleep didn’t sound all that interesting.
Right at that moment, the person behind him suddenly turned a little and an arm was strategically laid over him. He huffed and pushed it off of him, but moments later it was put back. The sound of the other’s calm breathing was rather entrancing and the warm air blown against his neck every time felt more reassuring than anything had done in the past nine months. He let out an annoyed groan, but snuggled closer against the warm body behind him anyway.
“Tell me again why you have to leave?” he wondered out loud, putting his hand on top of the other’s. There was a short silence before the answer came, softly and almost hesitantly.
“Because I have a concert tomorrow.”
He could only huff again when hearing those words. “Cancel it.”
“And disappoint my fans? I can’t do that. They all paid for their tickets and expect me to come.” the other mumbled, causing him to sigh deeply.
“I’m sure they won’t’ mind you postponing your concert. They can wait a little longer.” he protested, but the other chuckled amusedly.
“I have to go, Chul. My plane is at seven, I have to get up at five to catch it.” the reply then came, followed by a soft sigh from the other as if talking about it seemed to make him remember the crappiness of the whole situation.
“Five? But that’s like..three hours from now.” Heechul muttered in protest.
“Yes. All the more reason to shut up and get the last few hours we can get.” the smile was obvious in his voice as he said those words, after which he turned a little to position himself better and then rested his chin on Heechul’s shoulder.
“I don’t want to sleep. When I wake up you will be gone. I don’t want you to be gone.” the latter said to that statement, his voice slightly whiny. There came no immediate reply and in the silence that followed, Heechul wondered if the other had fallen asleep, but suddenly Hangeng moved closer to him and muzzled their cheeks together.
“I will come back tomorrow.” he then promised, smiling lightly.
“Yeah, sure. You said that last time too. ‘I will be back soon.’ But I didn’t see you for nine freaking months, you moron.” Heechul immediately contradicted those words.
“Well I was incredibly busy, Chul. Besides, I told you I would come back, yes, but I never said how long it would take. This is my last concert and I took some free time without schedules, so I’ll be back tomorrow.”
The silence that followed showed how much Heechul believed those words. Before anyone could say anything, however, a certain cat woke up again and decided that three in the morning was the best time to go hyperactive without warning. So they both nearly rolled out of the bed in shock when suddenly a cat jumped on the covers and started attacking everything that moved - or moved just in his mind. It took some time for their suddenly erratic heartbeats to slow down again.
“You know you could have at least called or something. I don’t need you to appear at my doorstep, but a call at least?” Heechul continued the conversation softly once that was the case.
“I called. You just didn’t pick up.” Hangeng immediately contradicted, making Heechul frown and then feel slightly guilty, glad that the Chinese man could not see his face in the dark.
“You have to text me first, I’m busy.” he snapped, but he knew the other saw right through the façade and the lies. He wasn’t surprised when the answer that followed had completely nothing to do with the matter at hand.
“You’re an idiot.” Hangeng told him in such a way that made it clear he was not angry about the little lie but more amused and maybe even thinking it full-out laughable. Heechul didn’t even need a second to give an answer; “Yes that too.”
Hangeng smiled over those words, resting his head a little closer next to Heechul’s. There was another one of their silence, before he patted Heechul’s hand. “Go to sleep.” he then mumbled.
“I don’t want to sleep. I’ll stay awake until five and then make you stay here.” the elder protested with no humour whatsoever in his voice.
“Fine.” Hangeng calmly replied. “Do as you please, but I’m going to catch some sleep now.” He closed his eyes, but obviously didn’t really expect to be left alone to sleep by Heechul, as he merely lay waiting until the other would talk again. Meanwhile, Baengshin had given up on his hyperactivity again and calmly walked up to the pillow to lie down again right above their heads. It was when his belly touched the fabric, that Heechul spoke again.
“Tell me again why you have to get up at five..?” he mumbled, eyes closed but still very much awake and completely engulfed in thoughts about his friend’s flight from the next day.
“I have a concert tomorrow.” Hangeng replied with a sigh, knowing that he should have expected the question coming from his friends.
“What time?” the latter immediately inquired to know.
“Five in the evening.”
“Who goes to a concert at five in the evening?” Heechul rolled his eyes as he said those words, thinking the timing pretty stupid.
“Apparently lots of people because it’s sold out.” the younger immediately retorted, sounding slightly annoyed. “But it starts at eight. Only I have to be there at five.”
“Then why do you have to go at five in the morning? Sleep a little longer.” Heechul grumbled, untouched by the annoyed sound of the other’s voice. He lifted his hand and stroked the cat above his head a little. His actions earned him a loud purring almost right next to his ear.
“Because I wasn’t supposed to be here from the start. I didn’t even tell anyone I was coming here.” Hangeng sighed, slightly starting to think that maybe it had been wiser not to show up in Korea at all. Then again, he had promised to come back, so there was no way he could’ve stayed away forever. One day he would have had to face Heechul’s wrath anyway, so better now than later, when it would have been even worse.
“Oh, so soon you’ll get a call from your manager asking where the hell you are?” the elder sounded almost as if he was looking forward to that, but Hangeng shook his head, even though Heechul couldn’t see that.
“No.” he replied, leaving a short silence before continuing. “I turned off my phone.”
Another silence ensued and Heechul found himself wondering why the hell Hangeng showed up at eleven in the evening just to spend a night of sleep in Heechul’s bed and then leave again at five in the morning. He was still in the middle of thinking bad things when Hangeng softly took hold of his hand and intertwined their fingers.
In the following minutes they didn’t speak anymore again, but Heechul felt how Hangeng softly squeezed his hand and snuggled closer to him. A small smile appeared on his face and he slowly pulled his fingers out of Hangeng’s grasp. Yet even before he had the chance to pull away his hand completely, it was already taken hold of again and Hangeng intertwined their fingers once more. There was a slight battle of wills going on between them, before Hangeng kind of won when Heechul decided to let their hands be clasped together.
“How have things been, Chullie?” the Chinese man slowly asked, caressing the other’s hand with his thumb.
“Fine.” Heechul replied rather coldly. “I learned Chinese.”
“Ni hao. Wo shi Hangeng, ni shi Xi Che.” the soft voice immediately told him, making him chuckle slightly at the still only slightly familiar sound of the Chinese and his Chinese name. “I missed you.” Hangeng then softly added to his words, much less joking then before.
“I didn’t miss you. At all.” Heechul coldly replied, but there was a smile on his face. And he still smiled as he turned his head a little to the other to be able to catch a glimpse of the Chinese man’s face. The movement merely earned him another cheek-muzzle, which proved to him that Hangeng didn’t believe a word of what he was saying.
“You’re ruining my perfect skin.” he therefore complained half heartedly to his friend.
“You sound like such a moron, Heechul. You’re complaining like an ahjumma. Or maybe you’re more of a noona. You do look like one. My noona.” the latter then told him with a soft laugh. Heechul scoffed, but felt a slight bit of amusement at those words.
“You are such an idiot.” He said with a hint of that same amusement in his voice.
“I am your idiot, my noona.” Hangeng went on joking, causing Heechul to pull his hand out of Hangeng’s completely and swat his leg. Yet the other seemed to have seen that coming, because there were arms wrapped around him again immediately and he was pulled closer against the Chinese man’s chest a mere second later.
Right at that moment, a rather stalker-like Baengshin placed himself right in their middle, pushing its head against Heechul’s shoulder and practically stuffing its butt in Hangeng’s face. The latter merely pulled one arm free and moved the cat back to the pillow.
“Ah Baengshin.. I know you never really liked me, but this is really too much.” he sighed.
“What are you talking about? Baengshin just loves you! Heebum is the one who can’t stand you.” Heechul retorted amusedly. His words caused the younger to snort slightly.
“He even holds part of my name. Ungrateful cat. Much like his owner..” He let a few seconds pause between those words and the next. “..my noona.”
Heechul’s soft laugher made Hangeng smile as well and he wrapped his arm around the other’s middle again, snuggling as close as possible and resting his head against Heechul’s back. It didn’t take long for him to sink away into a hard-needed sleep after he closed his eyes, leaving Heechul awake all by himself to ponder over everything for a long time.
The next morning woke him with a lot of movement to his left. “Good morning.” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes to get rid of the sleep. There was an angry sound coming from next to him.
“Good close to noon, you mean? It’s eleven. My alarm clock didn’t work.” Hangeng then said, obviously a little more awake already than he was himself. He lay in silence for a while longer before a smile tugged up the corners of his mouth.
“Or maybe someone turned it off.” he said amusedly. A short astonished silence followed, before the arm around his middle was pulled away.
“YAH HEECHUL YOU….!!!”
Fic Challenge - 036; Bathroom tiles [20/100]
Title: Bathroom Tiles
Characters: Siwon, Hankyung
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.099
Summary: Siwon's life is filled with regrets and Hangeng listens to them.
A/N: This is a spinoff to the Go!Stop series that I started with Life would be perfect if we had these just a while ago. Because the idea of the Go!Stop was so intriguing and I really wanted to write something from other people's point of view than Donghae's, I started on this one. In the end it didn't quite turn out to be what I expected and it gives a whole new look on the events in Lwbpiwht but I feel it does have quite a nice vibe. Part of the fic challenge because I can make it so and the bathroom tiles title inspired me~
- - - - -
It’s two in the morning when he wakes up, drenched in sweat and images still haunting him. He wonders how they’ve managed to find him time and again, even after moving. Somewhere early September, he agreed to take over the control of the machine room, causing him to have to move halfway across the country. Hyukjae said it was fine, they’d call to keep up. Donghae…distanced himself from them after a while. He thinks it’s growing up, Hyukjae thinks it’s staying a kid, they both never had a clue.
Ever since he works in the machine room, he knows so much more, so many hidden truths. One of them is how smart Donghae really is and how blind they have been. It was not just coincidence that mere months after Hyukjae asked for it, a time travelling device was created; it was Donghae who created it. He didn’t want to tell Hyukjae at first, but then did so anyway in the end. It didn’t change how much they needed the device. It did change the way they looked at it.
He rolls over and grabs his phone, a lifeline whenever he needs the comfort over night. “Gege...” he speaks into it once the dial tone is disrupted. I can’t sleep. It remains unsaid, but they both know it’s the reason he calls. There’s not even a two second silence before the other person answers. “Siwon-ah..” He swallows, then gets up from the bed and walks to the bathroom. It’s almost a relief to be able to hold his wrists under the cold water and feel his whole body relax a little.
The phone is clasped between his ear and shoulder as he stands in the bathroom, leaning his head against the wall. He’s pretty sure he’s breathing rather heavily into the mouthpiece, but he doesn’t care and he knows his hyung doesn’t either. He turns off the tap and steps backwards until his back rests against the wall. It’s rather dark in the bathroom, the light above the sink the only thing illuminating the little room. There’s silence as he closes his eyes, silence as he sinks down onto the floor and it stays silent as he lets his thoughts get the best of him.
“Siwon-ah..” the voice repeats after some time, gently prying him out of his misery. He breathes in deeply, takes the phone in his hand again and uses the other hand to slide his fingers over the ground. There’s a sense of familiarity to it all, the tiles shaped just the way he remembers them from distant memories, the colour so soothing it almost hurts. But then the image wavers and he’s looking at the plain white bathroom tiles again. They’re far from the ones he knows so well. Far from the memories that warm yet hurt his heart every time he tries to touch upon them.
“It hurts, gege.” he finds himself telling the elder out of nowhere. “Knowing we left him behind like that. Knowing he’s all alone in that world.” He gets up, walks a circle in the bathroom and sits back down. There’s something infinitely cold eating at his insides, making him feel so guilty and lost. But Hangeng is there, and he tells himself that over and over until the panic dies away again.
They’re silent then, breathing in and out, each lost in their own memories. They do this more often, calling in the middle of the night, living in normal time and just listening to each other wonder about the things in life. He treasures those moments most, because they are what make him remember what living really is about. Life, he finds when he looks back at the past year, has become very lifeless.
“Hyukjae called today. He said he saw Donghae. He said Donghae looks happy.” he speaks again after a long time, back pressed against the cold wall. “He said Donghae still lives in normal time.” And he can understand why, really. Sitting and thinking like this, having had 30 minutes pass at most when it felt like several days. Hangeng hums something and Siwon knows he’s tired. Heck, they’re all tired. One year passed like it’s only a week, tons of work still left to do for them.
“How’s Hyukjae doing?” Hangeng asks then with genuine interest. Hangeng is always genuine. There’s no fake smiles to him, no hidden annoyance or plastic honesty. “I heard he got a job?”
“Yeah, for the time that rests him.” Siwon agrees, a bitter smile on his face.
“Do you really think it will work?” is the question that immediately follows, Hangeng questioning exactly that what he’s been wondering about as well.
“I don’t know, gege, I don’t know.” He sighs and feels so many things at once. It’s strange to really feel anything at all, but somehow it’s also very reassuring. It makes him realise he’s alive, not a robot – which is how he feels in everyday life lately.
“Kibum hates doing this.” Hangeng speaks again and this time Siwon is less happy about his friend’s honesty.
“I know. But he offered. He loves spending time with Donghae. I can’t help it either that his great example, the creator of Go!Stop, is also the one who hates it the most.” he retorts. “In less than a year, this will all be over for him. He’ll move back into Go!Stop life and leave Donghae behind. With some luck, this world will seize to exist or Donghae will disappear to a better place. Who knows?”
“Yes… Who knows?” Hangeng agrees, but there’s resentment in his voice, a feeling that Siwon can understand well. They are, after all, forcing their friend into even worse times in a vain hope of making him turn them better for himself.
They fall silent again and Siwon imagines Hangeng staring at the ceiling like he’s staring at the ground. He counts lines and crossroads between the tiles, remembers playing with soap and drawing moustaches with it as little kids. He remembers playing hide and seek and being found in the bath rub every single time. He remembers friends he now hardly sees anymore.
He falls asleep against the bathroom wall that night, phone stuck to his ear, Hangeng’s soft, even breathing on the other side. When he wakes up the next morning, the form of the bathroom tiles are pressed into his cheek. He sighs as he gets up and dusts himself off. He then wishes his friend a good morning, presses the fast-forward button and goes back to work.
Back to the void.
Characters: Siwon, Hankyung
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.099
Summary: Siwon's life is filled with regrets and Hangeng listens to them.
A/N: This is a spinoff to the Go!Stop series that I started with Life would be perfect if we had these just a while ago. Because the idea of the Go!Stop was so intriguing and I really wanted to write something from other people's point of view than Donghae's, I started on this one. In the end it didn't quite turn out to be what I expected and it gives a whole new look on the events in Lwbpiwht but I feel it does have quite a nice vibe. Part of the fic challenge because I can make it so and the bathroom tiles title inspired me~
- - - - -
It’s two in the morning when he wakes up, drenched in sweat and images still haunting him. He wonders how they’ve managed to find him time and again, even after moving. Somewhere early September, he agreed to take over the control of the machine room, causing him to have to move halfway across the country. Hyukjae said it was fine, they’d call to keep up. Donghae…distanced himself from them after a while. He thinks it’s growing up, Hyukjae thinks it’s staying a kid, they both never had a clue.
Ever since he works in the machine room, he knows so much more, so many hidden truths. One of them is how smart Donghae really is and how blind they have been. It was not just coincidence that mere months after Hyukjae asked for it, a time travelling device was created; it was Donghae who created it. He didn’t want to tell Hyukjae at first, but then did so anyway in the end. It didn’t change how much they needed the device. It did change the way they looked at it.
He rolls over and grabs his phone, a lifeline whenever he needs the comfort over night. “Gege...” he speaks into it once the dial tone is disrupted. I can’t sleep. It remains unsaid, but they both know it’s the reason he calls. There’s not even a two second silence before the other person answers. “Siwon-ah..” He swallows, then gets up from the bed and walks to the bathroom. It’s almost a relief to be able to hold his wrists under the cold water and feel his whole body relax a little.
The phone is clasped between his ear and shoulder as he stands in the bathroom, leaning his head against the wall. He’s pretty sure he’s breathing rather heavily into the mouthpiece, but he doesn’t care and he knows his hyung doesn’t either. He turns off the tap and steps backwards until his back rests against the wall. It’s rather dark in the bathroom, the light above the sink the only thing illuminating the little room. There’s silence as he closes his eyes, silence as he sinks down onto the floor and it stays silent as he lets his thoughts get the best of him.
“Siwon-ah..” the voice repeats after some time, gently prying him out of his misery. He breathes in deeply, takes the phone in his hand again and uses the other hand to slide his fingers over the ground. There’s a sense of familiarity to it all, the tiles shaped just the way he remembers them from distant memories, the colour so soothing it almost hurts. But then the image wavers and he’s looking at the plain white bathroom tiles again. They’re far from the ones he knows so well. Far from the memories that warm yet hurt his heart every time he tries to touch upon them.
“It hurts, gege.” he finds himself telling the elder out of nowhere. “Knowing we left him behind like that. Knowing he’s all alone in that world.” He gets up, walks a circle in the bathroom and sits back down. There’s something infinitely cold eating at his insides, making him feel so guilty and lost. But Hangeng is there, and he tells himself that over and over until the panic dies away again.
They’re silent then, breathing in and out, each lost in their own memories. They do this more often, calling in the middle of the night, living in normal time and just listening to each other wonder about the things in life. He treasures those moments most, because they are what make him remember what living really is about. Life, he finds when he looks back at the past year, has become very lifeless.
“Hyukjae called today. He said he saw Donghae. He said Donghae looks happy.” he speaks again after a long time, back pressed against the cold wall. “He said Donghae still lives in normal time.” And he can understand why, really. Sitting and thinking like this, having had 30 minutes pass at most when it felt like several days. Hangeng hums something and Siwon knows he’s tired. Heck, they’re all tired. One year passed like it’s only a week, tons of work still left to do for them.
“How’s Hyukjae doing?” Hangeng asks then with genuine interest. Hangeng is always genuine. There’s no fake smiles to him, no hidden annoyance or plastic honesty. “I heard he got a job?”
“Yeah, for the time that rests him.” Siwon agrees, a bitter smile on his face.
“Do you really think it will work?” is the question that immediately follows, Hangeng questioning exactly that what he’s been wondering about as well.
“I don’t know, gege, I don’t know.” He sighs and feels so many things at once. It’s strange to really feel anything at all, but somehow it’s also very reassuring. It makes him realise he’s alive, not a robot – which is how he feels in everyday life lately.
“Kibum hates doing this.” Hangeng speaks again and this time Siwon is less happy about his friend’s honesty.
“I know. But he offered. He loves spending time with Donghae. I can’t help it either that his great example, the creator of Go!Stop, is also the one who hates it the most.” he retorts. “In less than a year, this will all be over for him. He’ll move back into Go!Stop life and leave Donghae behind. With some luck, this world will seize to exist or Donghae will disappear to a better place. Who knows?”
“Yes… Who knows?” Hangeng agrees, but there’s resentment in his voice, a feeling that Siwon can understand well. They are, after all, forcing their friend into even worse times in a vain hope of making him turn them better for himself.
They fall silent again and Siwon imagines Hangeng staring at the ceiling like he’s staring at the ground. He counts lines and crossroads between the tiles, remembers playing with soap and drawing moustaches with it as little kids. He remembers playing hide and seek and being found in the bath rub every single time. He remembers friends he now hardly sees anymore.
He falls asleep against the bathroom wall that night, phone stuck to his ear, Hangeng’s soft, even breathing on the other side. When he wakes up the next morning, the form of the bathroom tiles are pressed into his cheek. He sighs as he gets up and dusts himself off. He then wishes his friend a good morning, presses the fast-forward button and goes back to work.
Back to the void.
Fic Challenge - 062; God [19/100]
Title: God
Characters: Hankyung, Kangin
Rating: G
Wordcount: 505
Summary: Drunk midnight blabbering, or maybe the most truthful Hankyung has ever been.
A/N: This was written in several takes, all on different occasions right before going to bed. I don't quite know what the point of this is, but it's purely dialogue, nothing else. It's not exactly a masterpiece and I'm not particularly in love with it, but it passed since I can't write about God for the life of it anyway.
- - - - -
When I die, I want to go to heaven.
Since when do you believe in heaven?
I don’t. But it sounds nice, doesn’t it? Everything you can dream right where you can reach it. Everything you want, and all the people you loved will be there too. Everyone you miss right now will be waiting for you with open arms. Doesn’t that sound wonderful?
Maybe…
What do you mean?
Think about it. They knew you before they died only. Who knows how much you’ve changed since then? Who knows how much they’ve changed? They could have changed into the complete opposite of what they were after spending so many years in heaven themselves. What if they don’t want to know you anymore? Have you thought about that?
You’re so pessimistic. If there’s a heaven, I’m sure it’s good, because God would have made it.
So now you even trust in God?
Perhaps I’m becoming like Siwon. Maybe his devotion is contagious. Or maybe I’m just drunk and talking crap. Who knows?
I vote for the last. This is your fifth beer and you’re bad with alcohol.
I know.
Then why did you keep drinking?
Sometimes you need a moment to breathe, you know. I used to… Well. But now I just drink some.
It’s only today. Tomorrow we can say that we’ve never been here before.
Yeah, and if you keep drinking like this you’ll believe it because you’re too drunk to remember.
Something like that, yes.
…
You miss them, don’t you? Your parents..
Incredibly. But it doesn’t really matter. They’re not here and I have no time to go there.
Don’t you want to try keep in contact with them?
I already do.
You send them one e-mail a month and that’s only if they’ve answered to your previous e-mail. you know you want to talk to them, so why not simply do it?
Because it’s not my battle to fight. I’m here in Korea, they are in china, why are we having this conversation, somebody fill up my empty glass, please? People actually want to drink here.
This is not how it’s supposed to be. God wants all his children happy.
I am happy.
You’re drinking to forget your problems… Yes, my point exactly. Let’s go home now, it’s getting late. Up you go, I’ll pay. Oh please, don’t tell me you can’t stand on your own. One, two, arm around my shoulders and let’s go.
There’s so many people here.
Yes, there’s some, you probably see double the amount.
Youngwoon-ah…
Yes Kyung?
If God wanted me to keep contact with me parents, he wouldn’t have given me the opportunity of a lifetime in Korea. He would’ve given me something similar in China.
One day He will, Kyung. Now keep walking, I’d like to get home before you pass out on me.
I think I’d like to go to heaven.
That’d be nice, yes.
Will you come with me then? I don’t want to be alone…
We won’t let you be alone.
Characters: Hankyung, Kangin
Rating: G
Wordcount: 505
Summary: Drunk midnight blabbering, or maybe the most truthful Hankyung has ever been.
A/N: This was written in several takes, all on different occasions right before going to bed. I don't quite know what the point of this is, but it's purely dialogue, nothing else. It's not exactly a masterpiece and I'm not particularly in love with it, but it passed since I can't write about God for the life of it anyway.
- - - - -
When I die, I want to go to heaven.
Since when do you believe in heaven?
I don’t. But it sounds nice, doesn’t it? Everything you can dream right where you can reach it. Everything you want, and all the people you loved will be there too. Everyone you miss right now will be waiting for you with open arms. Doesn’t that sound wonderful?
Maybe…
What do you mean?
Think about it. They knew you before they died only. Who knows how much you’ve changed since then? Who knows how much they’ve changed? They could have changed into the complete opposite of what they were after spending so many years in heaven themselves. What if they don’t want to know you anymore? Have you thought about that?
You’re so pessimistic. If there’s a heaven, I’m sure it’s good, because God would have made it.
So now you even trust in God?
Perhaps I’m becoming like Siwon. Maybe his devotion is contagious. Or maybe I’m just drunk and talking crap. Who knows?
I vote for the last. This is your fifth beer and you’re bad with alcohol.
I know.
Then why did you keep drinking?
Sometimes you need a moment to breathe, you know. I used to… Well. But now I just drink some.
It’s only today. Tomorrow we can say that we’ve never been here before.
Yeah, and if you keep drinking like this you’ll believe it because you’re too drunk to remember.
Something like that, yes.
…
You miss them, don’t you? Your parents..
Incredibly. But it doesn’t really matter. They’re not here and I have no time to go there.
Don’t you want to try keep in contact with them?
I already do.
You send them one e-mail a month and that’s only if they’ve answered to your previous e-mail. you know you want to talk to them, so why not simply do it?
Because it’s not my battle to fight. I’m here in Korea, they are in china, why are we having this conversation, somebody fill up my empty glass, please? People actually want to drink here.
This is not how it’s supposed to be. God wants all his children happy.
I am happy.
You’re drinking to forget your problems… Yes, my point exactly. Let’s go home now, it’s getting late. Up you go, I’ll pay. Oh please, don’t tell me you can’t stand on your own. One, two, arm around my shoulders and let’s go.
There’s so many people here.
Yes, there’s some, you probably see double the amount.
Youngwoon-ah…
Yes Kyung?
If God wanted me to keep contact with me parents, he wouldn’t have given me the opportunity of a lifetime in Korea. He would’ve given me something similar in China.
One day He will, Kyung. Now keep walking, I’d like to get home before you pass out on me.
I think I’d like to go to heaven.
That’d be nice, yes.
Will you come with me then? I don’t want to be alone…
We won’t let you be alone.
[FIC] Vitasoy
Title: Vitasoy
Characters: Hangeng, Zhou Mi
Rating: G
Wordcount: 117
Summary: Zhou Mi likes Vitasoy, Hangeng thinks it sucks.
A/N: This one's pure dialogue, that's why it has so little words. I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless.
- - - - -
“Hangeng gege, can I have some Vitasoy?”
“Vitasoy?”
“Yes it’s a milk drink. Soyamilk, to be more exact and..”
“I know what it is, Zhou Mi, but do you like that?”
“Yes it tastes rather nice.”
“You are weird.”
“Thanks, I get it more often.”
. - . - . - . - . - .
“God you’re drinking that again?”
“Yes.”
“What was the name again? Vi-something.. Viterbol?”
“Vitasoy.”
“Oh right, that was it.”
“Nice guess, Hangeng gege.”
“Ha-ha, very funny. But really, you like that? It tastes like.. Well like cat pee.”
“Yeah, doesn’t it taste great?”
“Completely gone crazy, you have. If I ever drink this they can send me to hell.”
“It’s rather nice, you know.”
“It tastes like cat pee.”
“You only think it does. Try one with strawberry flavour, maybe that’ll make it taste better.”
“Over my dead body.”
. - . - . - . - . - .
“Happy birthday, Zhou Mi. I got you a gift”
“Thank you Hangeng gege, but you shouldn’t have. What is it, though?”
“Open it up and you’ll see.”
“Vitasoy?”
“Strawberry flavour. Tastes better.”
Characters: Hangeng, Zhou Mi
Rating: G
Wordcount: 117
Summary: Zhou Mi likes Vitasoy, Hangeng thinks it sucks.
A/N: This one's pure dialogue, that's why it has so little words. I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless.
- - - - -
“Hangeng gege, can I have some Vitasoy?”
“Vitasoy?”
“Yes it’s a milk drink. Soyamilk, to be more exact and..”
“I know what it is, Zhou Mi, but do you like that?”
“Yes it tastes rather nice.”
“You are weird.”
“Thanks, I get it more often.”
. - . - . - . - . - .
“God you’re drinking that again?”
“Yes.”
“What was the name again? Vi-something.. Viterbol?”
“Vitasoy.”
“Oh right, that was it.”
“Nice guess, Hangeng gege.”
“Ha-ha, very funny. But really, you like that? It tastes like.. Well like cat pee.”
“Yeah, doesn’t it taste great?”
“Completely gone crazy, you have. If I ever drink this they can send me to hell.”
“It’s rather nice, you know.”
“It tastes like cat pee.”
“You only think it does. Try one with strawberry flavour, maybe that’ll make it taste better.”
“Over my dead body.”
. - . - . - . - . - .
“Happy birthday, Zhou Mi. I got you a gift”
“Thank you Hangeng gege, but you shouldn’t have. What is it, though?”
“Open it up and you’ll see.”
“Vitasoy?”
“Strawberry flavour. Tastes better.”
Thursday, 25 August 2011
[FIC] Life couldn't get better
Title: Life couldn't get better
Characters: Hangeng, Heechul
Rating: G
Wordcount: 468
Summary: Hangeng is convinced to agree to an arranged marriage.
A/N: Another drabble. This one's a sequel to Just My Luck. (Well it's more of a Hangeng POV from the events there.) Everyone who read the first part will already know what's going to happen here, but I hope you still enjoy this. x3 Because everyone told me to write a sequel and my daughter then encouraged me to really do so; here it is. Hope you enjoy. ^.^
- - - - -
I love my parents dearly, don’t misunderstand me, but somehow they got the idea in their head that because I am twenty-six years old now and still haven't found someone that I would like to give my heart to, they should arrange my marriage. Fun! I didn’t think so..
One day my mother took me to the city and told me she wanted new photographs of me. Well it’s my mother, she has strange ideas more often, so I did as she asked me to, but it wasn’t until I got the pictures of my bride-to-be that I found out why that was the case. Well, at least my bride wasn’t ugly, so all I had to hope for was for her to have an okay personality.
After I decided that the girl was pretty, I guessed I could try making it work, because well.. I can’t just disappoint my parents like that. So I passed through 500 stores in one week with my father, trying to find a nice suit, and then got taught a million dances and the whole book of etiquette by my mother in the next week. By the end of the three week period, I was completely styled into the perfect groom.
It was kind of fun, actually, and although I would never admit it to my friends, I enjoyed the idea of settling down with someone, having the possibility to start a family. I could see myself playing around with the toddlers and taking care of them like any good parent would. Yeah, I really think I would be a good father.
That’s why when the day came that I was going to meet my bride, I didn’t feel bad. I had also talked to a girl whose husband had been arranged for her as well and she told me that out of all marriages, the ones that work out best are mostly the arranged ones, because people get into them with no expectations whatsoever and things can only get better than expected that way. So I did exactly that; expect nothing.
The moment my bride-to-be, a twenty-seven year old Korean by the name of Kim Heechul, walked into the room, I was staring at her already. She was pretty. There is no other way to describe it. She was wearing rather boyish clothes, but I thought to myself that I could get used to that if she liked it. We shook hands and she greeted me shortly. It was then that I realised that there was something worse than a pretty but totally egoistic bride.
Apparently my father thought I’m gay.
Apparently Heechul is not a girl.
Please let a hole open beneath me and swallow me right now.
Excerpt from Hangeng's diary - Written August the 26th at 8.43 PM
Characters: Hangeng, Heechul
Rating: G
Wordcount: 468
Summary: Hangeng is convinced to agree to an arranged marriage.
A/N: Another drabble. This one's a sequel to Just My Luck. (Well it's more of a Hangeng POV from the events there.) Everyone who read the first part will already know what's going to happen here, but I hope you still enjoy this. x3 Because everyone told me to write a sequel and my daughter then encouraged me to really do so; here it is. Hope you enjoy. ^.^
- - - - -
I love my parents dearly, don’t misunderstand me, but somehow they got the idea in their head that because I am twenty-six years old now and still haven't found someone that I would like to give my heart to, they should arrange my marriage. Fun! I didn’t think so..
One day my mother took me to the city and told me she wanted new photographs of me. Well it’s my mother, she has strange ideas more often, so I did as she asked me to, but it wasn’t until I got the pictures of my bride-to-be that I found out why that was the case. Well, at least my bride wasn’t ugly, so all I had to hope for was for her to have an okay personality.
After I decided that the girl was pretty, I guessed I could try making it work, because well.. I can’t just disappoint my parents like that. So I passed through 500 stores in one week with my father, trying to find a nice suit, and then got taught a million dances and the whole book of etiquette by my mother in the next week. By the end of the three week period, I was completely styled into the perfect groom.
It was kind of fun, actually, and although I would never admit it to my friends, I enjoyed the idea of settling down with someone, having the possibility to start a family. I could see myself playing around with the toddlers and taking care of them like any good parent would. Yeah, I really think I would be a good father.
That’s why when the day came that I was going to meet my bride, I didn’t feel bad. I had also talked to a girl whose husband had been arranged for her as well and she told me that out of all marriages, the ones that work out best are mostly the arranged ones, because people get into them with no expectations whatsoever and things can only get better than expected that way. So I did exactly that; expect nothing.
The moment my bride-to-be, a twenty-seven year old Korean by the name of Kim Heechul, walked into the room, I was staring at her already. She was pretty. There is no other way to describe it. She was wearing rather boyish clothes, but I thought to myself that I could get used to that if she liked it. We shook hands and she greeted me shortly. It was then that I realised that there was something worse than a pretty but totally egoistic bride.
Apparently my father thought I’m gay.
Apparently Heechul is not a girl.
Please let a hole open beneath me and swallow me right now.
Excerpt from Hangeng's diary - Written August the 26th at 8.43 PM
[FIC] Just my luck
Title: Just my luck
Characters: Heechul, Hangeng
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 352
Summary: Heechul gets pushed into an arranged marriage
A/N: I was over at my granny's for 3 days without internet or computer and I did an awesome amount of writing again. In the middle of all the Itscom chapters, I somehow also managed to write a little drabble that makes no sense whatsoever and was just fun to write. I hope to spread some of my good mood from when I was at my granny's around SJW, to make everywhere a happier place! LoL. (That sounded like a world peace speech..) Anyways, just read and enjoy and let yourself be happy like me. =P
- - - - -
So I don't know what got into my mother, but some three-four weeks ago she decided that because I am twenty-seven years old now and still haven't found someone to spend the rest of my life with, she should arrange me a marriage. Woopie.. Not.
First of all, I got dragged to some photographer to get my pictures taken so that whoever she had chosen for me would be able to admire my good looks. The same was done for me, but I had no interest whatsoever seeing this person, so the pictures sent to me went right into the paper bin.
But then came everything else, because pictures weren't the only thing my mother made me get, of course. She came to me for every little detail about the wedding and I kept sending her away every time again, but she just didn't seem to grasp the fact that 'No, mom, I really am not DYING TO MARRY SOME STRANGER.'
Needless to say that she isn't my best friend anymore, doing all those things to my life without my permission even, but okay. My father isn't of much help either. Not that he helps her destroying my future, but he also doesn't stop her from doing so. Thanks a lot, dad.
Anyway, I tried objecting for like a week or two, maybe three at most, before I finally decided to accept whatever bullshit she had gotten in her head, because hey, it’s my mother.. I got my stubbornness from somewhere, you know? Besides, I figured if I didn't get too much in my mind things could only turn out better for me than expected, which is a good thing, right?
Well, I changed my mind. When I was standing there across from Hangeng, a 26 year old Chinese guy who is supposed to be my together forever, even my expectations of a fat, blind, half-deaf, drooling and incontinent ninety-seven year old lady were better than this..
Apparently my mother thinks I'm gay.
Apparently Hangeng thinks I'm a girl.
FML.
Blogpost by Kim Heechul - Posted August the 26th at 9.43 PM
Characters: Heechul, Hangeng
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 352
Summary: Heechul gets pushed into an arranged marriage
A/N: I was over at my granny's for 3 days without internet or computer and I did an awesome amount of writing again. In the middle of all the Itscom chapters, I somehow also managed to write a little drabble that makes no sense whatsoever and was just fun to write. I hope to spread some of my good mood from when I was at my granny's around SJW, to make everywhere a happier place! LoL. (That sounded like a world peace speech..) Anyways, just read and enjoy and let yourself be happy like me. =P
- - - - -
So I don't know what got into my mother, but some three-four weeks ago she decided that because I am twenty-seven years old now and still haven't found someone to spend the rest of my life with, she should arrange me a marriage. Woopie.. Not.
First of all, I got dragged to some photographer to get my pictures taken so that whoever she had chosen for me would be able to admire my good looks. The same was done for me, but I had no interest whatsoever seeing this person, so the pictures sent to me went right into the paper bin.
But then came everything else, because pictures weren't the only thing my mother made me get, of course. She came to me for every little detail about the wedding and I kept sending her away every time again, but she just didn't seem to grasp the fact that 'No, mom, I really am not DYING TO MARRY SOME STRANGER.'
Needless to say that she isn't my best friend anymore, doing all those things to my life without my permission even, but okay. My father isn't of much help either. Not that he helps her destroying my future, but he also doesn't stop her from doing so. Thanks a lot, dad.
Anyway, I tried objecting for like a week or two, maybe three at most, before I finally decided to accept whatever bullshit she had gotten in her head, because hey, it’s my mother.. I got my stubbornness from somewhere, you know? Besides, I figured if I didn't get too much in my mind things could only turn out better for me than expected, which is a good thing, right?
Well, I changed my mind. When I was standing there across from Hangeng, a 26 year old Chinese guy who is supposed to be my together forever, even my expectations of a fat, blind, half-deaf, drooling and incontinent ninety-seven year old lady were better than this..
Apparently my mother thinks I'm gay.
Apparently Hangeng thinks I'm a girl.
FML.
Blogpost by Kim Heechul - Posted August the 26th at 9.43 PM
[FIC] Hot chocolates and a milkshake
Title: Hot chocolates and a milkshake
Characters: Hangeng, OC
Rating: G
Wordcount: 3.805
Summary: How buying yourself a CD for your birthday can turn out.
A/N: Do you know this feeling when you write 3.805 words and feel like you could’ve just not written them at all? That is how I feel right now. I really don’t know what this piece of story is good for, just that it is a story for my unni’s birthday and she deserves something with lots of Hangeng in it like this. Also; I just can't stick to short stories, they always have to be long(er) these days.
- - - - -
It started probably many years ago. The first time she met him, they were in a CD store, both taking a different copy of the same CD. When she glanced at him to see who was taking the same as her – a normal human curiosity – he sent her a friendly smile and nodded shortly in greeting, making her automatically nod back. For her, it would have ended there, but he turned the CD around, looked at the track list on the back for a moment and then said: “So you like them too?”
She of course couldn’t just ignore him, but she didn’t feel like sharing her favourite music with a stranger, so she slightly shook her head as she replied. “No, it’s for a friend. She has a birthday coming up.” Well, that was partly true at least. She DID have her birthday coming up soon. He looked up at her again at those words, expression seeming interested.
“Oh really?” he then asked, leaning a little closer to give her copy a closer look. She instinctively shied away from him a little, but he seemed unaffected by that as he merely continued talking. “There’s some damage on this case. If it’s for a birthday you should get one that at least looks as new as it is.” The next thing she knew, she was holding his copy and he had taken hers.
“Happy birthday to the friend.” he told her, smiling once more at her before walking off. She could only stare after him, dumbfounded. When she looked back at the CD she was holding, she saw that it was indeed a much better state than the one he had taken with him, and she couldn’t help but smile, because this one was much prettier. So she set for her father and showed him her CD, telling him she wanted that as her birthday present.
Some three or four years later, she was meanwhile living in the city with her flatmate, going to university there and enjoying life as a young woman in her twenties, she went out for a drink and they met again. It had been around the same time in the year, her birthday coming up soon, and the weather outside being horribly terrible. She met up with her boyfriend in a café a little more downtown.
Things had been going rough between them since she wanted to study and pass her year whereas he wanted to party and make love, so she kind of expected the break-up, but that didn’t make it any less hard to hear him tell her it was over. He was a sweet guy when he found it in himself to care and she did love him, but she preferred finishing her studies so she could be less dependent on her parents over having fun with him and remaining under their care forever.
So that’s how her now ex-boyfriend walked away on her, leaving her with his empty glass of coke that he didn’t even pay for. She didn’t move at first, just staring at the empty glass, considering how it was much like their relationship had been near the end; just the package and none of what was supposed to be inside. She sighed, poked a finger at the glass and then quickly had to reach out to stop it from falling off the table. Right when she put it back in place, someone spoke up.
“Rough day?” it sounded next to her and she looked up to see the bartender putting a hot chocolate in front of her. She frowned at it, looking back up to him immediately after.
“I think you’re at the wrong table. I didn’t order a..” she started, but he interrupted her with a friendly smile.
“It’s on the house. Hot coco always helps.”
For a moment she thought he was trying to hit on her, but then he nodded in greeting and turned away, walking off again. She followed him with her eyes, seeing how he took the jar filled with tips and pulled some money out to put it in the cash register, probably matching the amount she would have had to pay for the hot chocolate. She felt like she was stealing his money taking the drink, but when he looked up at her, she quickly focused on the hot chocolate in front of her, picking up the cookie that came with it.
It was half an hour later when she left, leaving money for the coke and a tip that was probably twice the amount of the cost of the hot chocolate. When she reached the door, someone called out a ‘Hey hot coco!’ and when she looked back, the bartender was standing at her table, smiling at her, the money in his hand. “Happy birthday to the friend.” he told her, nodding again in greeting and walking back to the bar.
She left with a confused feeling and it wasn’t until late that evening that she suddenly remembered in a flash the boy from so many years ago who had said the same to her when she went buying a CD and she found herself considering if he was the same guy. But how could that be? It would be too big of a coincidence, and more importantly, why would someone even remember such a detail?
Surprisingly, it wasn’t even two weeks later when she saw him again, since her friend, Tan Zhi Xin, dragged her to the same café her ex had taken her, saying it was a cosy place with a very friendly and polite bartender, a great spot to have a drink for her birthday. It isn’t hard to imagine her surprise and amusement when her friend parked the car in front of the slightly familiar café and they walked in to see the more than slightly familiar young man standing behind the bar, looking up to greet her. When his eyes landed on her, his smile widened if only slightly, and he nodded in greeting.
“Heya hot coco.” he said amused. “Back for seconds already?” For some reason she didn’t feel the same apprehension towards his closeness as she had done the previous time, kind of realising it was just his way of acting and not some cheap way of flirting, so she smiled back at him.
“Afternoon birthday boy.” she then replied, making up a nickname for him on the spot. “I figured I couldn’t leave the opportunity to have another hot coco on the house.” He grinned even wider, if that was humanly possible and motioned the both of them to take a table. They did exactly that, Zhi Xin picking up the menu to be able to hide behind it as she shot her a questioning look.
“You’ve been here before?” soon followed the look and she couldn’t help but smile a little amused.
“Why yes..” she replied, leaning back in her chair and looking at the other shortly. “This is where my ex broke up with me.” Immediately Zhi Xin’s expression turned from surprised to apologetic.
“Oh my gosh, I didn’t know! Why didn’t you tell me?” she exclaimed, immediately growing silent again when the bartender walked up to their table.
“So a hot coco for hot coco.” he said, putting it in front of her, before turning to Zhi Xin. “And what can I get you, miss?” Her friend gave him a short pensive look, before smiling.
“You can give me a hot coco too if they’re free anyway.” she then said with an amused grin. The young man laughed.
“A hot coco on the house it is then.” he said, but her friend stopped him before he could leave.
“And pancakes with sugar for both of us, don’t you think?” With those last words, Zhi Xin turned back to her, so she nodded. Eating pancakes was always nice and if her friend was paying anyway, she would not object. A slight smile spread on her face as the young man went back to the bar to get their orders.
It was a pleasant evening, just chatting with Zhi Xin, eating delicious pancakes and drinking two hot chocolates each. To her, that was probably one of the most enjoyable birthdays in a while and she went home feeling more relaxed than she had done for a while. When they left the bar, they put enough money on the table to pay for everything they had taken, including the four hot chocolates, because it didn’t feel right to let birthday boy pay for their food, even if he offered to do so himself.
A long time passed again after that in which she went to school, studied and slept. With the exams coming up, she had no time to play around, which was quite a bummer to say the least. Yet one day she found herself with no food left in her apartment and her roommate staying over at friends, so she was forced to go out to get groceries or some sort of food. It was a fifteen minute walk to the closest store, but the only thing closer than that was a hot dog stand and she really didn’t feel like hotdogs, so the walk didn’t sound too bad to her.
When she arrived at the store, it was as good as empty, which wasn’t that big of a surprise since it was near closing times. She went to get the stuff she needed – vegetables, meat, some spices,.. – before calmly moving on to the cash register. There was one person before her and when that young man turned to leave, she suddenly heard a ‘Heya hot coco!’
Surprised, she looked up, but the guy walking away was completely unfamiliar to her. Frowning a little, she put the last item on the cash desk and turned to the cashier. That was the moment when her mouth dropped open a little and she quite dumbly gaped at the happily smiling, all too familiar young man.
“How are you this evening?” he asked her and she suddenly remembered what closing her mouth was like so she could swallow and answer that question.
“Are you stalking me?” Or she could ask that, of course. Even though it wasn’t what she had planned on saying, it was what she had wanted to ask, but it was still embarrassing. He merely laughed, eyeing her in amusement.
“I could ask you the same, no?” he then said, as he started scanning the products. “You’re the one who keeps showing up at my work.” She smiled, slightly embarrassed still, but then just passed him her reduction card as if nothing happened.
“Speaking of which.. Got tired of bartending?” she then asked, just to not look like a complete fool, but it didn’t help much as he grinned and shook his head.
“No, I’m still doing that. I just work multiple jobs to earn my living.” he told her, amused at her being so flustered. She nodded in understanding.
“Isn’t that hard to keep up with, two jobs and school?” she wondered, taking out her wallet and scanning through it for money.
“Three jobs, actually, and I left school. You know, too much work.” he grinned, so she smiled back, but his words didn’t really reach her as she discovered right at that moment that she had brought no money – or at least not enough. She let out a muttered curse, then looked up at him with a slightly panicked expression.
“I didn’t bring enough money.” she told him, answering the question written on his face before he could ask it. “Is it okay if I run home quickly and come back to pay? I’ll be twenty minutes if I hurry.” she pleaded. He immediately picked up the bag and started putting it aside with a smile on his face.
“Yeah sure that’s n-“ he started, but then he stopped, his smile faltering. “Wait.. We’re near closing time and the boss has to leave early today, I can’t keep open..” Her face fell as she stared at her groceries. No money meant no groceries, no groceries meant no food, no food meant either hotdogs after all or starving. She wasn’t sure which one she preferred. Before she could decide which one she preferred, he spoke again. “Tell you what.. My shift ends in like five minutes. I’ll pay for you now and I’ll wait outside with your groceries while you get the money” She stared at him.
“Are you serious?” she then asked, obviously not believing that someone would actually do that for a stranger. But he just grinned and nodded.
“What part of the city do you live in?” he then asked her and she didn’t even hesitate as she pointed in the general direction of her house, naming her street. His grin only widened at that. “Really? I can walk along then and save you the trip back. My place is only a few blocks away.”
So that’s what happened. He walked home with her once the store was closed and she let him wait outside for a minute as she got the money. He left after a short goodbye, but she couldn’t help calling him as he was about twenty meters away from her, making him turn back with a questioning smile. She felt slightly insecure for a moment, before manning up and clearing her throat.
“Uh.. I never got your name.” she said, sending a slight smile his way, and he grinned at her, turning around again and walking on without replying, but right before she could feel offended, he lifted a hand to wave at her, not looking back as he answered.
“It’s Hangeng.”
Her exams and holidays all passed before she saw him again. Even if she had wanted to see him before, she didn’t know anything about him, just his name and the places he worked at, but she had no idea when he worked there, so trying to catch him at work would pretty much be a lost cause. It wasn’t like she was dying to meet him either. But they met again anyway. This time not at one of his work places, but randomly on the street.
And after that it happened again and again and again. Never planned, never arranged beforehand, but always happening. Mostly he was the one calling out to her first, making her notice his presence, but a few select times she would be the one calling him first. They never purposefully went to look for each other – at least she didn’t think so. But one day, that changed.
It did not because of him, but because of her ex. One day he appeared at her door and as she opened up for him, he stuffed flowers in her hand, smiled, wished her a happy day and left again. She was left staring at his flowers for about a minute, before she went after him. He as nowhere to be seen anymore. Slightly dishevelled, she found a nice vase for the flowers and put them on the table because it was a waste to get rid of them.
Her next week was spent ignoring her roommate who kept going on about her secret admirer who kept sending her all kinds of presents. When she finally called up her ex to ask about it, he told her he wanted her back, and even though she turned him down multiple times, he didn’t listen. She wanted to talk to Zhi Xin about it, but she knew her friend would only tell her to give him another chance because he was a great guy.
So instead, that evening, with little hope in her heart, she took a bus to the more downtown part of Seoul and walked into the café Hangeng worked at, happy to be greeted by his signature ‘Heya hot coco. How’s the day?’ the moment he walked up to her table. She smiled at him, but then sighed slightly as she gave him a ‘It’s going good.’ in reply, immediately gaining his interest.
“Give me a moment to serve these other customers.” he told her. “I’ll get back to you immediately after.” He walked off to help the people still wanting drinks and came back a mere ten minutes later, putting a chocolate milkshake in front of he. She couldn’t help but smile. The weather outside was wonderful that day, so it amused her that he changed the usual hot chocolate he’d pass her. What surprised her more was that he took a seat on the chair next to her, however. “Shoot.” he then said and she automatically made a gun with her hand to pretend to shoot him. He chuckled. “Okay, bad wording. Tell me what’s up.”
“Ah, you know..” she sighed, hesitating a moment as she looked at him, but then things just spilled. “There’s this guy who keeps bothering me even though I tell him to go and it’s starting to annoy me.” She took a sip from her milkshake and then stirred it a bit with her straw.
“What does he do then?” Hangeng asked, obviously wanting her to tell him what’s up so he could help. She felt herself smile already just because he showed his care for her. It was strange but nice to realise how they went from strangers to .. strangers who cared about each other. Yeah, if you thought about it like that it was just strange, nothing else.
“Well.. He used to me my boyfriend last year. We broke up a few months ago, but now it seems like he wants me back, which makes no sense because he’s the one who broke up with me to begin with. But I don’t want him back, really.. I’d rather just focus on my studies for now and then see later what I’ll do with my love life.” she explained the situation, earning a pensive nod from Hangeng. “And I tried to tell him that, but he says he’s fine with studies coming first and that he’ll just spend my free time with me, but.. If I’m completely honest, I don’t love him anymore, and he just won’t listen when I try to tell him that.”
Hangeng looked at her a moment, nodding in understanding, and then sat up a little straighter. “Tell him you found someone else?” he then told her. “They usually back away when they realise you really did move on.”
“But he’ll never believe me unless I come with proof.” she objected to that, causing Hangeng to frown and continue his musing.
“That’s a problem indeed Maybe you can find someone to help you out, pretend to be your new flame?” he uttered after a while. They both lapsed into a silence thinking over that possibility. “But who could help you without making things complicated to keep up later? Do you know anyone he doesn’t?”
And then there was the awkward moment in which he stared at her waiting for her answer and she stared back with an idea, hoping he would get it. They remained silent until she opened her mouth to offer her idea, but that was about the moment when he seemed to catch what her look meant and he immediately lifted his hands in a rejecting way.
“Me? No, no, no, I can’t!” he protested, so immediate and set that she was a little taken aback. But the next moment she realised her own bluntness.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” she apologised, which seemed to calm him down. “You probably have a girlfriend and all that. It was stupid of me.”
“No it’s not that.” he immediately denied. “It’s just.. I really suck at acting. People can see in a blink when I’m lying.” He sent her a sheepish smile, but was called away by another customer before she could respond. She was left to ponder over the possibilities by herself again. When he sat back down, she looked up to find the other customers had paid the bill and left, so they were the only ones now. He sighed as he thought over the situation again. “I wish I could help you out, though.” he then said.
“Maybe you can.” she suddenly piped up, an idea forming in her head. His worried face made her grin. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t involve any pretending. We can just take a picture of the two of us with my phone like couples do, making a cute face or something?” At that, he started smiling.
“That’s a good idea!” he agreed. “We can do it now if you want? It’s a public place, makes it all the more believing.” She looked around for a moment, feeling slightly awkward, but then deciding that he was right and that it didn’t really matter where they took the picture anyway.
So she took out her phone and he immediately moved closer to drape his arm around her shoulders. They took a bunch of pictures, ranging from cute to funny to absolutely embarrassing. At one point he even patted her head and told her he’d call her milkshake from now on, for as long as the summer lasted. She chuckled at that and as she lifted her milkshake glass happily to empty it, he snapped a solo shot of her with his own phone. She frowned at that, making him show her the picture. She actually didn’t look too bad, so she was okay with him keeping it.
“Hey I have to get back to work now, before the boss comes by and sees me messing around.” he told her as he pocketed his phone again. Before she caught what was going on, he had leaned in and pressed a kiss on her cheek. For a moment she froze in shock, but then she turned to look at him. He was calmly looking back, not seeming the least bit embarrassed. She frowned, slightly confused and unsure of what to make of it, whether to take it as just a kiss or see more behind it, but before she could open her mouth, he smiled and ruffled her hair.
“Don’t worry.” he then said. “I’m fine with sticking around in your friend life until you finish your studies and feel ready to think about your love life.” He grinned as he got up from his chair and picked up her empty milkshake glass to take it to the bar with him, leaving her staring after him with a feeling that probably could be named best as ‘speechless.’
It was there, at that moment, that she realised he was either mentally deranged or an angel sent from heaven, but either way, it made her feel happy that she was allowed to call him a friend.
Characters: Hangeng, OC
Rating: G
Wordcount: 3.805
Summary: How buying yourself a CD for your birthday can turn out.
A/N: Do you know this feeling when you write 3.805 words and feel like you could’ve just not written them at all? That is how I feel right now. I really don’t know what this piece of story is good for, just that it is a story for my unni’s birthday and she deserves something with lots of Hangeng in it like this. Also; I just can't stick to short stories, they always have to be long(er) these days.
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It started probably many years ago. The first time she met him, they were in a CD store, both taking a different copy of the same CD. When she glanced at him to see who was taking the same as her – a normal human curiosity – he sent her a friendly smile and nodded shortly in greeting, making her automatically nod back. For her, it would have ended there, but he turned the CD around, looked at the track list on the back for a moment and then said: “So you like them too?”
She of course couldn’t just ignore him, but she didn’t feel like sharing her favourite music with a stranger, so she slightly shook her head as she replied. “No, it’s for a friend. She has a birthday coming up.” Well, that was partly true at least. She DID have her birthday coming up soon. He looked up at her again at those words, expression seeming interested.
“Oh really?” he then asked, leaning a little closer to give her copy a closer look. She instinctively shied away from him a little, but he seemed unaffected by that as he merely continued talking. “There’s some damage on this case. If it’s for a birthday you should get one that at least looks as new as it is.” The next thing she knew, she was holding his copy and he had taken hers.
“Happy birthday to the friend.” he told her, smiling once more at her before walking off. She could only stare after him, dumbfounded. When she looked back at the CD she was holding, she saw that it was indeed a much better state than the one he had taken with him, and she couldn’t help but smile, because this one was much prettier. So she set for her father and showed him her CD, telling him she wanted that as her birthday present.
Some three or four years later, she was meanwhile living in the city with her flatmate, going to university there and enjoying life as a young woman in her twenties, she went out for a drink and they met again. It had been around the same time in the year, her birthday coming up soon, and the weather outside being horribly terrible. She met up with her boyfriend in a café a little more downtown.
Things had been going rough between them since she wanted to study and pass her year whereas he wanted to party and make love, so she kind of expected the break-up, but that didn’t make it any less hard to hear him tell her it was over. He was a sweet guy when he found it in himself to care and she did love him, but she preferred finishing her studies so she could be less dependent on her parents over having fun with him and remaining under their care forever.
So that’s how her now ex-boyfriend walked away on her, leaving her with his empty glass of coke that he didn’t even pay for. She didn’t move at first, just staring at the empty glass, considering how it was much like their relationship had been near the end; just the package and none of what was supposed to be inside. She sighed, poked a finger at the glass and then quickly had to reach out to stop it from falling off the table. Right when she put it back in place, someone spoke up.
“Rough day?” it sounded next to her and she looked up to see the bartender putting a hot chocolate in front of her. She frowned at it, looking back up to him immediately after.
“I think you’re at the wrong table. I didn’t order a..” she started, but he interrupted her with a friendly smile.
“It’s on the house. Hot coco always helps.”
For a moment she thought he was trying to hit on her, but then he nodded in greeting and turned away, walking off again. She followed him with her eyes, seeing how he took the jar filled with tips and pulled some money out to put it in the cash register, probably matching the amount she would have had to pay for the hot chocolate. She felt like she was stealing his money taking the drink, but when he looked up at her, she quickly focused on the hot chocolate in front of her, picking up the cookie that came with it.
It was half an hour later when she left, leaving money for the coke and a tip that was probably twice the amount of the cost of the hot chocolate. When she reached the door, someone called out a ‘Hey hot coco!’ and when she looked back, the bartender was standing at her table, smiling at her, the money in his hand. “Happy birthday to the friend.” he told her, nodding again in greeting and walking back to the bar.
She left with a confused feeling and it wasn’t until late that evening that she suddenly remembered in a flash the boy from so many years ago who had said the same to her when she went buying a CD and she found herself considering if he was the same guy. But how could that be? It would be too big of a coincidence, and more importantly, why would someone even remember such a detail?
Surprisingly, it wasn’t even two weeks later when she saw him again, since her friend, Tan Zhi Xin, dragged her to the same café her ex had taken her, saying it was a cosy place with a very friendly and polite bartender, a great spot to have a drink for her birthday. It isn’t hard to imagine her surprise and amusement when her friend parked the car in front of the slightly familiar café and they walked in to see the more than slightly familiar young man standing behind the bar, looking up to greet her. When his eyes landed on her, his smile widened if only slightly, and he nodded in greeting.
“Heya hot coco.” he said amused. “Back for seconds already?” For some reason she didn’t feel the same apprehension towards his closeness as she had done the previous time, kind of realising it was just his way of acting and not some cheap way of flirting, so she smiled back at him.
“Afternoon birthday boy.” she then replied, making up a nickname for him on the spot. “I figured I couldn’t leave the opportunity to have another hot coco on the house.” He grinned even wider, if that was humanly possible and motioned the both of them to take a table. They did exactly that, Zhi Xin picking up the menu to be able to hide behind it as she shot her a questioning look.
“You’ve been here before?” soon followed the look and she couldn’t help but smile a little amused.
“Why yes..” she replied, leaning back in her chair and looking at the other shortly. “This is where my ex broke up with me.” Immediately Zhi Xin’s expression turned from surprised to apologetic.
“Oh my gosh, I didn’t know! Why didn’t you tell me?” she exclaimed, immediately growing silent again when the bartender walked up to their table.
“So a hot coco for hot coco.” he said, putting it in front of her, before turning to Zhi Xin. “And what can I get you, miss?” Her friend gave him a short pensive look, before smiling.
“You can give me a hot coco too if they’re free anyway.” she then said with an amused grin. The young man laughed.
“A hot coco on the house it is then.” he said, but her friend stopped him before he could leave.
“And pancakes with sugar for both of us, don’t you think?” With those last words, Zhi Xin turned back to her, so she nodded. Eating pancakes was always nice and if her friend was paying anyway, she would not object. A slight smile spread on her face as the young man went back to the bar to get their orders.
It was a pleasant evening, just chatting with Zhi Xin, eating delicious pancakes and drinking two hot chocolates each. To her, that was probably one of the most enjoyable birthdays in a while and she went home feeling more relaxed than she had done for a while. When they left the bar, they put enough money on the table to pay for everything they had taken, including the four hot chocolates, because it didn’t feel right to let birthday boy pay for their food, even if he offered to do so himself.
A long time passed again after that in which she went to school, studied and slept. With the exams coming up, she had no time to play around, which was quite a bummer to say the least. Yet one day she found herself with no food left in her apartment and her roommate staying over at friends, so she was forced to go out to get groceries or some sort of food. It was a fifteen minute walk to the closest store, but the only thing closer than that was a hot dog stand and she really didn’t feel like hotdogs, so the walk didn’t sound too bad to her.
When she arrived at the store, it was as good as empty, which wasn’t that big of a surprise since it was near closing times. She went to get the stuff she needed – vegetables, meat, some spices,.. – before calmly moving on to the cash register. There was one person before her and when that young man turned to leave, she suddenly heard a ‘Heya hot coco!’
Surprised, she looked up, but the guy walking away was completely unfamiliar to her. Frowning a little, she put the last item on the cash desk and turned to the cashier. That was the moment when her mouth dropped open a little and she quite dumbly gaped at the happily smiling, all too familiar young man.
“How are you this evening?” he asked her and she suddenly remembered what closing her mouth was like so she could swallow and answer that question.
“Are you stalking me?” Or she could ask that, of course. Even though it wasn’t what she had planned on saying, it was what she had wanted to ask, but it was still embarrassing. He merely laughed, eyeing her in amusement.
“I could ask you the same, no?” he then said, as he started scanning the products. “You’re the one who keeps showing up at my work.” She smiled, slightly embarrassed still, but then just passed him her reduction card as if nothing happened.
“Speaking of which.. Got tired of bartending?” she then asked, just to not look like a complete fool, but it didn’t help much as he grinned and shook his head.
“No, I’m still doing that. I just work multiple jobs to earn my living.” he told her, amused at her being so flustered. She nodded in understanding.
“Isn’t that hard to keep up with, two jobs and school?” she wondered, taking out her wallet and scanning through it for money.
“Three jobs, actually, and I left school. You know, too much work.” he grinned, so she smiled back, but his words didn’t really reach her as she discovered right at that moment that she had brought no money – or at least not enough. She let out a muttered curse, then looked up at him with a slightly panicked expression.
“I didn’t bring enough money.” she told him, answering the question written on his face before he could ask it. “Is it okay if I run home quickly and come back to pay? I’ll be twenty minutes if I hurry.” she pleaded. He immediately picked up the bag and started putting it aside with a smile on his face.
“Yeah sure that’s n-“ he started, but then he stopped, his smile faltering. “Wait.. We’re near closing time and the boss has to leave early today, I can’t keep open..” Her face fell as she stared at her groceries. No money meant no groceries, no groceries meant no food, no food meant either hotdogs after all or starving. She wasn’t sure which one she preferred. Before she could decide which one she preferred, he spoke again. “Tell you what.. My shift ends in like five minutes. I’ll pay for you now and I’ll wait outside with your groceries while you get the money” She stared at him.
“Are you serious?” she then asked, obviously not believing that someone would actually do that for a stranger. But he just grinned and nodded.
“What part of the city do you live in?” he then asked her and she didn’t even hesitate as she pointed in the general direction of her house, naming her street. His grin only widened at that. “Really? I can walk along then and save you the trip back. My place is only a few blocks away.”
So that’s what happened. He walked home with her once the store was closed and she let him wait outside for a minute as she got the money. He left after a short goodbye, but she couldn’t help calling him as he was about twenty meters away from her, making him turn back with a questioning smile. She felt slightly insecure for a moment, before manning up and clearing her throat.
“Uh.. I never got your name.” she said, sending a slight smile his way, and he grinned at her, turning around again and walking on without replying, but right before she could feel offended, he lifted a hand to wave at her, not looking back as he answered.
“It’s Hangeng.”
Her exams and holidays all passed before she saw him again. Even if she had wanted to see him before, she didn’t know anything about him, just his name and the places he worked at, but she had no idea when he worked there, so trying to catch him at work would pretty much be a lost cause. It wasn’t like she was dying to meet him either. But they met again anyway. This time not at one of his work places, but randomly on the street.
And after that it happened again and again and again. Never planned, never arranged beforehand, but always happening. Mostly he was the one calling out to her first, making her notice his presence, but a few select times she would be the one calling him first. They never purposefully went to look for each other – at least she didn’t think so. But one day, that changed.
It did not because of him, but because of her ex. One day he appeared at her door and as she opened up for him, he stuffed flowers in her hand, smiled, wished her a happy day and left again. She was left staring at his flowers for about a minute, before she went after him. He as nowhere to be seen anymore. Slightly dishevelled, she found a nice vase for the flowers and put them on the table because it was a waste to get rid of them.
Her next week was spent ignoring her roommate who kept going on about her secret admirer who kept sending her all kinds of presents. When she finally called up her ex to ask about it, he told her he wanted her back, and even though she turned him down multiple times, he didn’t listen. She wanted to talk to Zhi Xin about it, but she knew her friend would only tell her to give him another chance because he was a great guy.
So instead, that evening, with little hope in her heart, she took a bus to the more downtown part of Seoul and walked into the café Hangeng worked at, happy to be greeted by his signature ‘Heya hot coco. How’s the day?’ the moment he walked up to her table. She smiled at him, but then sighed slightly as she gave him a ‘It’s going good.’ in reply, immediately gaining his interest.
“Give me a moment to serve these other customers.” he told her. “I’ll get back to you immediately after.” He walked off to help the people still wanting drinks and came back a mere ten minutes later, putting a chocolate milkshake in front of he. She couldn’t help but smile. The weather outside was wonderful that day, so it amused her that he changed the usual hot chocolate he’d pass her. What surprised her more was that he took a seat on the chair next to her, however. “Shoot.” he then said and she automatically made a gun with her hand to pretend to shoot him. He chuckled. “Okay, bad wording. Tell me what’s up.”
“Ah, you know..” she sighed, hesitating a moment as she looked at him, but then things just spilled. “There’s this guy who keeps bothering me even though I tell him to go and it’s starting to annoy me.” She took a sip from her milkshake and then stirred it a bit with her straw.
“What does he do then?” Hangeng asked, obviously wanting her to tell him what’s up so he could help. She felt herself smile already just because he showed his care for her. It was strange but nice to realise how they went from strangers to .. strangers who cared about each other. Yeah, if you thought about it like that it was just strange, nothing else.
“Well.. He used to me my boyfriend last year. We broke up a few months ago, but now it seems like he wants me back, which makes no sense because he’s the one who broke up with me to begin with. But I don’t want him back, really.. I’d rather just focus on my studies for now and then see later what I’ll do with my love life.” she explained the situation, earning a pensive nod from Hangeng. “And I tried to tell him that, but he says he’s fine with studies coming first and that he’ll just spend my free time with me, but.. If I’m completely honest, I don’t love him anymore, and he just won’t listen when I try to tell him that.”
Hangeng looked at her a moment, nodding in understanding, and then sat up a little straighter. “Tell him you found someone else?” he then told her. “They usually back away when they realise you really did move on.”
“But he’ll never believe me unless I come with proof.” she objected to that, causing Hangeng to frown and continue his musing.
“That’s a problem indeed Maybe you can find someone to help you out, pretend to be your new flame?” he uttered after a while. They both lapsed into a silence thinking over that possibility. “But who could help you without making things complicated to keep up later? Do you know anyone he doesn’t?”
And then there was the awkward moment in which he stared at her waiting for her answer and she stared back with an idea, hoping he would get it. They remained silent until she opened her mouth to offer her idea, but that was about the moment when he seemed to catch what her look meant and he immediately lifted his hands in a rejecting way.
“Me? No, no, no, I can’t!” he protested, so immediate and set that she was a little taken aback. But the next moment she realised her own bluntness.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” she apologised, which seemed to calm him down. “You probably have a girlfriend and all that. It was stupid of me.”
“No it’s not that.” he immediately denied. “It’s just.. I really suck at acting. People can see in a blink when I’m lying.” He sent her a sheepish smile, but was called away by another customer before she could respond. She was left to ponder over the possibilities by herself again. When he sat back down, she looked up to find the other customers had paid the bill and left, so they were the only ones now. He sighed as he thought over the situation again. “I wish I could help you out, though.” he then said.
“Maybe you can.” she suddenly piped up, an idea forming in her head. His worried face made her grin. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t involve any pretending. We can just take a picture of the two of us with my phone like couples do, making a cute face or something?” At that, he started smiling.
“That’s a good idea!” he agreed. “We can do it now if you want? It’s a public place, makes it all the more believing.” She looked around for a moment, feeling slightly awkward, but then deciding that he was right and that it didn’t really matter where they took the picture anyway.
So she took out her phone and he immediately moved closer to drape his arm around her shoulders. They took a bunch of pictures, ranging from cute to funny to absolutely embarrassing. At one point he even patted her head and told her he’d call her milkshake from now on, for as long as the summer lasted. She chuckled at that and as she lifted her milkshake glass happily to empty it, he snapped a solo shot of her with his own phone. She frowned at that, making him show her the picture. She actually didn’t look too bad, so she was okay with him keeping it.
“Hey I have to get back to work now, before the boss comes by and sees me messing around.” he told her as he pocketed his phone again. Before she caught what was going on, he had leaned in and pressed a kiss on her cheek. For a moment she froze in shock, but then she turned to look at him. He was calmly looking back, not seeming the least bit embarrassed. She frowned, slightly confused and unsure of what to make of it, whether to take it as just a kiss or see more behind it, but before she could open her mouth, he smiled and ruffled her hair.
“Don’t worry.” he then said. “I’m fine with sticking around in your friend life until you finish your studies and feel ready to think about your love life.” He grinned as he got up from his chair and picked up her empty milkshake glass to take it to the bar with him, leaving her staring after him with a feeling that probably could be named best as ‘speechless.’
It was there, at that moment, that she realised he was either mentally deranged or an angel sent from heaven, but either way, it made her feel happy that she was allowed to call him a friend.
Fic Challenge - 039; All the people [14/100]
Title: All the people
Characters: Hankyung/Donghae
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.432
Summary: He's 28 now, but he doesn't have a clue where he's going.
A/N: This story is somehow a continuation of my previous shot, but it can also be read without reading the other. This was originally the kind of plot I had in mind for the birthday fic, but when I reached the ending it has now, I felt that it was better like that, because it was after all a birthday shot and not supposed to be depressing or anything. (Well that kinda didn't work since everyone seemed to cry over it anyway, but yeah..) Anyway, so this is the continuation of that other shot, but also something seperate. I decided I have a liking for Hangeng now and I might just write more of his drabbles from my Suju Fics Challenge, but we'll see about that later. For now, enjoy (?) this piece of work. I'm not quite sure if I like it or not, but it's not bad. :)
Prequel
- - - - -
“How is everyone?” the eldest of the two asks, his voice barely more than a mumble as his eyes skim the dimly lit plants and flowers.
“Fine. They’re fine. We’re all fine. Let’s not talk about us. Today is yours, so talk about you, hyung.” the other answers, casually slipping his hands halfway into the pockets of his jeans. They are walking through the small park that is only a few blocks away from the dumpling store. They’re the only two people out on the streets at this time of day – or night. In the distance the faded sounds of cars are audible, but they are easily ignored. “How are you?”
The question makes Hangeng look up at the other, sending a small smile his way. “You always know, don’t you?” he asks, making the other smile and shrug without saying a word. For a while the silence lasts as Hangeng looks past his friend and the latter calmly waits. Then he sighs and shrugs. “You know how you sometimes just want a break from things?”
It sounds so familiar to him that Donghae can’t help but chuckle as he nods. “Don’t we all?” he then replies, strolling to a bench near the side of the road and sitting down. He lets his head fall backwards, looking up at the sky like that. It doesn’t take long for Hangeng to take the spot next to him, soon leaning back as well so they are both looking at the same stars again. “But it’s what you do with the feeling that makes it bearable or not. Do you really think you will give up?”
There is silence, a silence that says more than any words the elder could have used, and Donghae sighs, turning his face from the stars back to Hangeng. “Of all the people in the company, you were the one to sue them..” he speaks, his voice soft, as if he knows he was prodding at wounds still too fresh to really touch. “I know you thought about it for a long time before deciding, so are you just going to throw that decision away now by doubting it and giving up what you have?”
It looks like Hangeng is going to talk back as he lifts his head as well and looks at his younger friend, but Donghae leaves him no chance to talk. “No, listen to me hyung. You decided this and there may be people against it, but it was your choice. You believed in it when you made it, keep believing in it. Keep believing in yourself. You aren’t one to just do without thinking, so keep going on, it’s worth it. You’re living your dream.”
“I’m living A dream, Hae, many people’s dream, but it’s never really been mine. I never had the passion to become a singer. Not like some of the others who dreamt of it all their lives. I was a dancer and I liked it. I had some future plan that involved opening a dance school, but most of all I expected to get a normal job and earn money to feed my family. Now I do what? Live up to other people’ s expectations? I’m twenty-eight and I don’t even have a girlfriend. I’m at an age where many others would start to get pushed into marriage by their parents, but mine just tell me to live my dream. Everyone tells me to live my dream while I can. What if it’s not my damn dream?”
Hangeng falls silent, his gaze having dropped to the ground in the middle of his rant, his thoughts felt heavy as he spoke them, yet somehow his head seems lighter when he stops talking. He glances up from the corner of his eyes, only to see Donghae smiling up at the night sky again. It seems like there’s nothing that can phase him today, where he would normally be crying after one bad word. When the younger finally turns his head and looks at him, Hangeng swears he sees wisdom beyond age in those eyes.
“You have all the possible means to live your dream, hyung.” Donghae speaks, lifting a hand to put it on the other’s shoulder shortly, before dropping it again. “You have feet to take you to the places you want to be, you have a mouth to tell others what it is you want, you have parents that support what you do and you have money that can help you getting there. The sky is the limit, hyung.”
Again they lapse into a silence, as Hangeng tries to find something to say written on the little path the bench is situated on, and Donghae is peacefully looking up at the sky again. Of course the younger is right, but sometimes Hangeng doesn’t want to hear the right words and just wants someone to agree with him. This is one of those times. For a while all that can be heard is the cars in the distance and the calm breathing of two men sitting on a bench in an empty park.
“See those stars, hyung?” A gentle hand is lifted and a finger points up to the sky, now filled with plenty of stars. “Those three in a row over there.” Hangeng spots the stars Donghae’s talking about and smiles slightly. “We made up some story about them, do you remember?” There’s a kind of childlike innocence in the question and Hangeng recognises the Donghae he knows again; the one who doesn’t see a bad thing in the world.
“Yeah I remember.” he replies, letting the memories of old days trickle into his mind and fill him with a nostalgic feeling. “It was you who made up stories about everything. I just sat there and listened.” he then mumbles, because he doesn’t want to take part of the credit.
“But it was because you listened that I made them up. If I would have sat there alone, I would not have come up with all the things I did.” Donghae contradicts him, only to chuckle moments later and drop a hand on his knee. “You know what? I feel like ice cream. Is there some place around here that sells ice cream?” Hangeng laughs, because he feels like it and there’s no reason to stop it. It’s the first laugh since the start of his birthday and it feels strangely freeing.
Twenty minutes later they’ve walked by every close-by ice cream store Hangeng could come up with, but there’s none still open. When Hangeng tries to offer going home and find some ice cream there, Donghae merely laughs and runs over to the first house where there’s some lights on. He rings the doorbell and comes back a while later with two popsicles and the widest grin as of yet on his face. He stuffs a rocket into Hangeng’s hand, and puts the other one in his own mouth with an expression that speaks of so much delight it’s adorable.
Hangeng wonders where Donghae learned that much Chinese, but decides not to ask as he enjoys his own popsicle. There’s stars shining in Donghae’s eyes and he feels the spark of courage in himself as well as Donghae licks the sticky water from his fingers with a mischievous grin. Before he knows it there’s a line of sticky red liquid on his cheek and Donghae is a few meters away already, laughing heartily at his own prank.
They spend the following hours walking around the city, gossiping about the other members, reminiscing the good old days and for some reason even playing tags at some point.
At four in the morning, Donghae takes a cab back to the airport to catch the first flight back home, but he stuffs a piece of paper in Hangeng’s hands first, claiming it’s a birthday gift. More specifically a ticket to this thing he likes.
When he unfolds the paper at home later that night, he reveals a line of quickly scribbled Korean that says; ‘One ticket to your future (we’ll be there too).’ and a cutely drawn smiley face. He smiles at everything for the rest of the day despite his severe lack of sleep and during the variety show filming that afternoon, he cracks the most jokes among all the guests.
Of all the people that could have visited him on his birthday, he’s glad Donghae was the one to actually buy a ticket and get on a plane, because the stars have never held more meaning than when he is around.
Characters: Hankyung/Donghae
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.432
Summary: He's 28 now, but he doesn't have a clue where he's going.
A/N: This story is somehow a continuation of my previous shot, but it can also be read without reading the other. This was originally the kind of plot I had in mind for the birthday fic, but when I reached the ending it has now, I felt that it was better like that, because it was after all a birthday shot and not supposed to be depressing or anything. (Well that kinda didn't work since everyone seemed to cry over it anyway, but yeah..) Anyway, so this is the continuation of that other shot, but also something seperate. I decided I have a liking for Hangeng now and I might just write more of his drabbles from my Suju Fics Challenge, but we'll see about that later. For now, enjoy (?) this piece of work. I'm not quite sure if I like it or not, but it's not bad. :)
Prequel
- - - - -
“How is everyone?” the eldest of the two asks, his voice barely more than a mumble as his eyes skim the dimly lit plants and flowers.
“Fine. They’re fine. We’re all fine. Let’s not talk about us. Today is yours, so talk about you, hyung.” the other answers, casually slipping his hands halfway into the pockets of his jeans. They are walking through the small park that is only a few blocks away from the dumpling store. They’re the only two people out on the streets at this time of day – or night. In the distance the faded sounds of cars are audible, but they are easily ignored. “How are you?”
The question makes Hangeng look up at the other, sending a small smile his way. “You always know, don’t you?” he asks, making the other smile and shrug without saying a word. For a while the silence lasts as Hangeng looks past his friend and the latter calmly waits. Then he sighs and shrugs. “You know how you sometimes just want a break from things?”
It sounds so familiar to him that Donghae can’t help but chuckle as he nods. “Don’t we all?” he then replies, strolling to a bench near the side of the road and sitting down. He lets his head fall backwards, looking up at the sky like that. It doesn’t take long for Hangeng to take the spot next to him, soon leaning back as well so they are both looking at the same stars again. “But it’s what you do with the feeling that makes it bearable or not. Do you really think you will give up?”
There is silence, a silence that says more than any words the elder could have used, and Donghae sighs, turning his face from the stars back to Hangeng. “Of all the people in the company, you were the one to sue them..” he speaks, his voice soft, as if he knows he was prodding at wounds still too fresh to really touch. “I know you thought about it for a long time before deciding, so are you just going to throw that decision away now by doubting it and giving up what you have?”
It looks like Hangeng is going to talk back as he lifts his head as well and looks at his younger friend, but Donghae leaves him no chance to talk. “No, listen to me hyung. You decided this and there may be people against it, but it was your choice. You believed in it when you made it, keep believing in it. Keep believing in yourself. You aren’t one to just do without thinking, so keep going on, it’s worth it. You’re living your dream.”
“I’m living A dream, Hae, many people’s dream, but it’s never really been mine. I never had the passion to become a singer. Not like some of the others who dreamt of it all their lives. I was a dancer and I liked it. I had some future plan that involved opening a dance school, but most of all I expected to get a normal job and earn money to feed my family. Now I do what? Live up to other people’ s expectations? I’m twenty-eight and I don’t even have a girlfriend. I’m at an age where many others would start to get pushed into marriage by their parents, but mine just tell me to live my dream. Everyone tells me to live my dream while I can. What if it’s not my damn dream?”
Hangeng falls silent, his gaze having dropped to the ground in the middle of his rant, his thoughts felt heavy as he spoke them, yet somehow his head seems lighter when he stops talking. He glances up from the corner of his eyes, only to see Donghae smiling up at the night sky again. It seems like there’s nothing that can phase him today, where he would normally be crying after one bad word. When the younger finally turns his head and looks at him, Hangeng swears he sees wisdom beyond age in those eyes.
“You have all the possible means to live your dream, hyung.” Donghae speaks, lifting a hand to put it on the other’s shoulder shortly, before dropping it again. “You have feet to take you to the places you want to be, you have a mouth to tell others what it is you want, you have parents that support what you do and you have money that can help you getting there. The sky is the limit, hyung.”
Again they lapse into a silence, as Hangeng tries to find something to say written on the little path the bench is situated on, and Donghae is peacefully looking up at the sky again. Of course the younger is right, but sometimes Hangeng doesn’t want to hear the right words and just wants someone to agree with him. This is one of those times. For a while all that can be heard is the cars in the distance and the calm breathing of two men sitting on a bench in an empty park.
“See those stars, hyung?” A gentle hand is lifted and a finger points up to the sky, now filled with plenty of stars. “Those three in a row over there.” Hangeng spots the stars Donghae’s talking about and smiles slightly. “We made up some story about them, do you remember?” There’s a kind of childlike innocence in the question and Hangeng recognises the Donghae he knows again; the one who doesn’t see a bad thing in the world.
“Yeah I remember.” he replies, letting the memories of old days trickle into his mind and fill him with a nostalgic feeling. “It was you who made up stories about everything. I just sat there and listened.” he then mumbles, because he doesn’t want to take part of the credit.
“But it was because you listened that I made them up. If I would have sat there alone, I would not have come up with all the things I did.” Donghae contradicts him, only to chuckle moments later and drop a hand on his knee. “You know what? I feel like ice cream. Is there some place around here that sells ice cream?” Hangeng laughs, because he feels like it and there’s no reason to stop it. It’s the first laugh since the start of his birthday and it feels strangely freeing.
Twenty minutes later they’ve walked by every close-by ice cream store Hangeng could come up with, but there’s none still open. When Hangeng tries to offer going home and find some ice cream there, Donghae merely laughs and runs over to the first house where there’s some lights on. He rings the doorbell and comes back a while later with two popsicles and the widest grin as of yet on his face. He stuffs a rocket into Hangeng’s hand, and puts the other one in his own mouth with an expression that speaks of so much delight it’s adorable.
Hangeng wonders where Donghae learned that much Chinese, but decides not to ask as he enjoys his own popsicle. There’s stars shining in Donghae’s eyes and he feels the spark of courage in himself as well as Donghae licks the sticky water from his fingers with a mischievous grin. Before he knows it there’s a line of sticky red liquid on his cheek and Donghae is a few meters away already, laughing heartily at his own prank.
They spend the following hours walking around the city, gossiping about the other members, reminiscing the good old days and for some reason even playing tags at some point.
At four in the morning, Donghae takes a cab back to the airport to catch the first flight back home, but he stuffs a piece of paper in Hangeng’s hands first, claiming it’s a birthday gift. More specifically a ticket to this thing he likes.
When he unfolds the paper at home later that night, he reveals a line of quickly scribbled Korean that says; ‘One ticket to your future (we’ll be there too).’ and a cutely drawn smiley face. He smiles at everything for the rest of the day despite his severe lack of sleep and during the variety show filming that afternoon, he cracks the most jokes among all the guests.
Of all the people that could have visited him on his birthday, he’s glad Donghae was the one to actually buy a ticket and get on a plane, because the stars have never held more meaning than when he is around.
[FIC] Happy Birthday
Title: Happy Birthday
Characters: Hangeng, Donghae
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.057
Summary: It's the first time Hangeng spends his birthday so far away from his friends.
A/N: So I felt the sudden urge to write a Hangeng story as it was his birthday after all. I asked my dear unni for a friendship Hangeng pairing & she gave me Hanhae, which is why you're here, reading the A/N of a Hanhae story now. Originally the plot for this was longer than what this story is, but I liked the ending as it is now. Iwill probably (maybe not) write wrote the rest of the plot into a different one-shot that I might or might not did post up here as well. As for now, enjoy this little piece of my imagination that holds a great love for a certain Chinese gentleman whom I want to squish loads right now. :)
Sequel
- - - - -
He was sitting in a corner of the dumpling store, sharing a meal with his parents for the first time in a long time. It was a mild February evening, the one right before his birthday actually, and the store was swarming with customers. Every now and then a fan would come up to ask for his autograph or to take a picture, others came to have a small conversation or wish him an early happy birthday, but in general they left him alone quite nicely.
As time passed, more and more people started to leave, but a select few stayed around a little longer. Because the store would be closed the next day, it was exclusively opened until midnight that evening and there were many who took advantage of that. He remained in his spot in the corner of the store, taking the birthday greetings from people with a smile and picking up his phone when he got a text every now and then.
It was close to midnight when suddenly the happy tune of some Chinese song sounded up from his phone. He automatically reached for it, picking up without looking at the caller ID, as he had a good idea of who it would be. The same person always called him up at the same time, the day before his birthday. He was late this day. Or early; depending on how one would look at it.
“Hey hyung.” it sounded through the phone, the voice slightly different from usual because of the rustle on the line, but still with the same seemingly never changing happy tone in it. “I’m sorry for being late, but happy birthday. I wanted to tell you face to face, yet someone thought it a good idea to run off to China so I couldn’t. I wonder who that idiot was, huh? Anyway, where’s the party this year? I hope you at least got free schedules so you can celebrate..?”
He was smiling widely because of the other’s words and didn’t hide his happiness as he replied with an amused “Thanks, Hae.” He had been a little unsure if Donghae would call. Ever since they met, the younger had dutifully wished him a happy birthday at midnight, the start of his birthday. Whether he did that in person or over the phone, Hae always managed to say it every year. But now that he had gone to China, he had feared the call might have been too expensive for the younger to make, so he was glad Donghae had still called.
“I actually have to film for a variety show tomorrow, but it’s only in the afternoon so I can sleep in for once. I don’t think there’s a birthday party going on, though, unless they’ve arranged a surprise party behind my back.” he continued talking after the short silence that had ensued as he pondered over his own luck. The reply came immediate, Donghae’s happy voice ringing in his ears as if he wasn’t miles away, but right beside him.
“I’m sure they did. Who could resist throwing you a birthday party, eh hyung?” the younger piped. There were some sounds in the background as if there were other people around and Hangeng figured Donghae was not alone wherever he was, yet something else grabbed his attention before he could ask about the younger’s whereabouts.
“Hae, about you being sorry for being late; you don’t have to be. Did you forget I’m one hour behind on Seoul now? It’s not yet midnight here, so you’re actually early.” he brought up the new thoughts, making the other side of the line become silent for a moment. When the silence didn’t seem to change, he got a little worried, so he tried to make sure the other was still there. “Hae?” he inquired, watching how the last customer got up and left.
“Yes I’m still here, hyung, don’t worry. I just had to answer someone for a moment.” the reply immediately came. He realised Donghae must have put his hand on the speaker, which explained the sudden silence. Before he could repeat himself in case Donghae didn’t catch it, the other continued talking. “But you’re right, hyung. I forgot China is one hour behind on Korea. I guess I still am in time then. Ain’t I awesome?”
“You are. You still broke your tradition of telling me exactly at midnight, though, that’s still a few minutes away.” Hangeng countered, unable to hide his grin as Donghae’s Mokpo dialect sounded through in his words. The younger chuckled as well.
“Ah, well.. I guess it can’t be helped.” he then sighed.
A short silence fell as they both listened to the noise on the line. This time Donghae was the one to break it again. “Say, do you want to watch the stars with me, hyung?” he asked in a soft voice, as if thinking back to something.
The question brought many memories back to Hangeng’s mind as well and he was up and walking to the door before being fully aware of it. He opened the door and walked out into the night, stopping at the side of the pavement and looking up at the sky. The street lights made him unable to see many stars, but he still tried his best.
“There’s not that many to be seen right now..” he said, belatedly remembering he hadn’t answered his friend. “But I’ll try searching for the ones we always used to look at.” He stared up at the night sky a moment longer, before he spoke again, his voice soft as he remembered days long gone. “Do you remember the first year we did this? When I missed my parents and you tried to cheer me up by showing me I was still living under the same stars they are..”
“I remember.” the reply came, just as soft, but moments later it was followed by a slightly more cheerful. “Hey hyung…it’s midnight.”
He wanted to ask something or crack a joke about him being officially old now, but two arms slipped around his middle before he could, and a head was rested against his back in the next moment. “Happy birthday, hyung.” the voice he had heard through a noisy connection mere moments before then sounded soft and clear from behind him.
Characters: Hangeng, Donghae
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.057
Summary: It's the first time Hangeng spends his birthday so far away from his friends.
A/N: So I felt the sudden urge to write a Hangeng story as it was his birthday after all. I asked my dear unni for a friendship Hangeng pairing & she gave me Hanhae, which is why you're here, reading the A/N of a Hanhae story now. Originally the plot for this was longer than what this story is, but I liked the ending as it is now. I
Sequel
- - - - -
He was sitting in a corner of the dumpling store, sharing a meal with his parents for the first time in a long time. It was a mild February evening, the one right before his birthday actually, and the store was swarming with customers. Every now and then a fan would come up to ask for his autograph or to take a picture, others came to have a small conversation or wish him an early happy birthday, but in general they left him alone quite nicely.
As time passed, more and more people started to leave, but a select few stayed around a little longer. Because the store would be closed the next day, it was exclusively opened until midnight that evening and there were many who took advantage of that. He remained in his spot in the corner of the store, taking the birthday greetings from people with a smile and picking up his phone when he got a text every now and then.
It was close to midnight when suddenly the happy tune of some Chinese song sounded up from his phone. He automatically reached for it, picking up without looking at the caller ID, as he had a good idea of who it would be. The same person always called him up at the same time, the day before his birthday. He was late this day. Or early; depending on how one would look at it.
“Hey hyung.” it sounded through the phone, the voice slightly different from usual because of the rustle on the line, but still with the same seemingly never changing happy tone in it. “I’m sorry for being late, but happy birthday. I wanted to tell you face to face, yet someone thought it a good idea to run off to China so I couldn’t. I wonder who that idiot was, huh? Anyway, where’s the party this year? I hope you at least got free schedules so you can celebrate..?”
He was smiling widely because of the other’s words and didn’t hide his happiness as he replied with an amused “Thanks, Hae.” He had been a little unsure if Donghae would call. Ever since they met, the younger had dutifully wished him a happy birthday at midnight, the start of his birthday. Whether he did that in person or over the phone, Hae always managed to say it every year. But now that he had gone to China, he had feared the call might have been too expensive for the younger to make, so he was glad Donghae had still called.
“I actually have to film for a variety show tomorrow, but it’s only in the afternoon so I can sleep in for once. I don’t think there’s a birthday party going on, though, unless they’ve arranged a surprise party behind my back.” he continued talking after the short silence that had ensued as he pondered over his own luck. The reply came immediate, Donghae’s happy voice ringing in his ears as if he wasn’t miles away, but right beside him.
“I’m sure they did. Who could resist throwing you a birthday party, eh hyung?” the younger piped. There were some sounds in the background as if there were other people around and Hangeng figured Donghae was not alone wherever he was, yet something else grabbed his attention before he could ask about the younger’s whereabouts.
“Hae, about you being sorry for being late; you don’t have to be. Did you forget I’m one hour behind on Seoul now? It’s not yet midnight here, so you’re actually early.” he brought up the new thoughts, making the other side of the line become silent for a moment. When the silence didn’t seem to change, he got a little worried, so he tried to make sure the other was still there. “Hae?” he inquired, watching how the last customer got up and left.
“Yes I’m still here, hyung, don’t worry. I just had to answer someone for a moment.” the reply immediately came. He realised Donghae must have put his hand on the speaker, which explained the sudden silence. Before he could repeat himself in case Donghae didn’t catch it, the other continued talking. “But you’re right, hyung. I forgot China is one hour behind on Korea. I guess I still am in time then. Ain’t I awesome?”
“You are. You still broke your tradition of telling me exactly at midnight, though, that’s still a few minutes away.” Hangeng countered, unable to hide his grin as Donghae’s Mokpo dialect sounded through in his words. The younger chuckled as well.
“Ah, well.. I guess it can’t be helped.” he then sighed.
A short silence fell as they both listened to the noise on the line. This time Donghae was the one to break it again. “Say, do you want to watch the stars with me, hyung?” he asked in a soft voice, as if thinking back to something.
The question brought many memories back to Hangeng’s mind as well and he was up and walking to the door before being fully aware of it. He opened the door and walked out into the night, stopping at the side of the pavement and looking up at the sky. The street lights made him unable to see many stars, but he still tried his best.
“There’s not that many to be seen right now..” he said, belatedly remembering he hadn’t answered his friend. “But I’ll try searching for the ones we always used to look at.” He stared up at the night sky a moment longer, before he spoke again, his voice soft as he remembered days long gone. “Do you remember the first year we did this? When I missed my parents and you tried to cheer me up by showing me I was still living under the same stars they are..”
“I remember.” the reply came, just as soft, but moments later it was followed by a slightly more cheerful. “Hey hyung…it’s midnight.”
He wanted to ask something or crack a joke about him being officially old now, but two arms slipped around his middle before he could, and a head was rested against his back in the next moment. “Happy birthday, hyung.” the voice he had heard through a noisy connection mere moments before then sounded soft and clear from behind him.
Fic Challenge - 015; Lick [10/100]
Title: Lick
Characters: Heechul/Hangeng
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 683
Summary: Cigarettes. He smokes them one too many times a day, but in all honesty he can’t be bothered to care.
A/N: And another dark one. My dearest daughter tells me I'm writing a lot of dark fics lately, but I just can't help it. I don't have the state of mind for happy and fluffy right now. -sigh-
- - - - -
Cigarettes.
He smokes them one too many times a day, but in all honesty he can’t be bothered to care. They tell him that he’s losing years of his life as he goes on smoking and he just smiles at them, tells them it’s okay. Because it is. Really. Especially considering the thrown-together heap of useless that people refer to as life these days.
He figures it’s the way they look at it against the way he looks at it, but when they tell him he’s wrong and that his life has a use, he finds it impossible to believe them. They know he doesn’t agree with them as he licks the paper of his newly rolled tobacco friend and puts it between his lips.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he dies.
There’s a flower pot on the window sill that he remembers as being a gift from someone he once held dear. The name slips down the edge of his memory as he tries to grasp it, but he doesn’t really care much. All he knows is that the pot hasn’t held flowers for years, but has meanwhile started to serve as an ashtray. One that shows his addiction when you look into it and find it already half filled with leftover pieces of cigarette.
Sometimes it’s amusing to think that he could probably build a house with the amount of tobacco packages he has emptied so far, but on the other hand it just annoys him, because if he’s got enough free time to smoke that many cigarettes, then what exactly is he doing here anyway? He snorts and turns away from the window sill, only to be stopped dead in his tracks when a voice reaches him: “Heechul-ah! You should water the flowers regularly or they’ll wither and die.”
The slightly accented Korean floods through him, strumming at his heartstrings and playing a melody he thought he had long forgotten. He gasps for air in a much more delicate way than when he’s choking on his own coughing again, and the next moment his eyes are leaking salty water drops. “Yah, why are you crying? I’ll only be gone..” he hears himself say to that accented voice, but the sound dies away before the sentence is finished.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he stops crying.
For a while he lets himself get lost in memories of a house filled with all kinds of different plants and flowers. He vaguely remembers a smile on soft pink lips and a shared bottle of beer, but the images fade away again before he can fully see them. There’s a slight feeling of belonging, tugging at his insides, but the next moment someone knocks on his door and he turns to look who’s there. When he sees a young man with black hair he frowns and cocks his head a little, as if to ask ‘Who are you?’ without really uttering any words.
“Hey Heechul.” the unknown young man tells him in accented Korean that somehow sounds familiar. “I’m just coming by to see how you’re doing. Looks like you’re still smoking, eh? Didn’t I tell you you should quit?” The young man smiles, but there’s tears in his eyes and Heechul finds himself wanting to wipe them away with his fingers. Instead he keeps a distance, because he doesn’t even know the other. His silence makes the other’s smile turn even more bitter. “It’s not good for you, you know.”
He disagrees, in silence, because no matter what the other says, he’s sure that smoking can’t be that bad. Because every time he blows out another breath of smoke, there’s images and voices, blurred and vague as if they’re coming from far away, but they’re still there. It gives him hope that things will get better. Sometimes he thinks he’s winning against the amnesia, but then the memories disappear again until he rolls and lights a new cigarette.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he remembers.
Characters: Heechul/Hangeng
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 683
Summary: Cigarettes. He smokes them one too many times a day, but in all honesty he can’t be bothered to care.
A/N: And another dark one. My dearest daughter tells me I'm writing a lot of dark fics lately, but I just can't help it. I don't have the state of mind for happy and fluffy right now. -sigh-
- - - - -
Cigarettes.
He smokes them one too many times a day, but in all honesty he can’t be bothered to care. They tell him that he’s losing years of his life as he goes on smoking and he just smiles at them, tells them it’s okay. Because it is. Really. Especially considering the thrown-together heap of useless that people refer to as life these days.
He figures it’s the way they look at it against the way he looks at it, but when they tell him he’s wrong and that his life has a use, he finds it impossible to believe them. They know he doesn’t agree with them as he licks the paper of his newly rolled tobacco friend and puts it between his lips.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he dies.
There’s a flower pot on the window sill that he remembers as being a gift from someone he once held dear. The name slips down the edge of his memory as he tries to grasp it, but he doesn’t really care much. All he knows is that the pot hasn’t held flowers for years, but has meanwhile started to serve as an ashtray. One that shows his addiction when you look into it and find it already half filled with leftover pieces of cigarette.
Sometimes it’s amusing to think that he could probably build a house with the amount of tobacco packages he has emptied so far, but on the other hand it just annoys him, because if he’s got enough free time to smoke that many cigarettes, then what exactly is he doing here anyway? He snorts and turns away from the window sill, only to be stopped dead in his tracks when a voice reaches him: “Heechul-ah! You should water the flowers regularly or they’ll wither and die.”
The slightly accented Korean floods through him, strumming at his heartstrings and playing a melody he thought he had long forgotten. He gasps for air in a much more delicate way than when he’s choking on his own coughing again, and the next moment his eyes are leaking salty water drops. “Yah, why are you crying? I’ll only be gone..” he hears himself say to that accented voice, but the sound dies away before the sentence is finished.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he stops crying.
For a while he lets himself get lost in memories of a house filled with all kinds of different plants and flowers. He vaguely remembers a smile on soft pink lips and a shared bottle of beer, but the images fade away again before he can fully see them. There’s a slight feeling of belonging, tugging at his insides, but the next moment someone knocks on his door and he turns to look who’s there. When he sees a young man with black hair he frowns and cocks his head a little, as if to ask ‘Who are you?’ without really uttering any words.
“Hey Heechul.” the unknown young man tells him in accented Korean that somehow sounds familiar. “I’m just coming by to see how you’re doing. Looks like you’re still smoking, eh? Didn’t I tell you you should quit?” The young man smiles, but there’s tears in his eyes and Heechul finds himself wanting to wipe them away with his fingers. Instead he keeps a distance, because he doesn’t even know the other. His silence makes the other’s smile turn even more bitter. “It’s not good for you, you know.”
He disagrees, in silence, because no matter what the other says, he’s sure that smoking can’t be that bad. Because every time he blows out another breath of smoke, there’s images and voices, blurred and vague as if they’re coming from far away, but they’re still there. It gives him hope that things will get better. Sometimes he thinks he’s winning against the amnesia, but then the memories disappear again until he rolls and lights a new cigarette.
And he wonders how many more licks it will take until he remembers.
[FIC] Four in the morning
Title: Four in the morning
Characters: Hangeng, OC
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.278
Summary: Sometimes no words are sufficient enough to say what you feel inside.
A/N: A story written quite a while ago again, but one that has a rather special feel for me. I noticed many people seemed to like this one, so I figured it could not be left out from my LJ. So here it is! ^.^
- - - - -
It’s silent. It should be. The clock tells me it’s almost four in the morning, yet I cannot get myself to sleep. I write while forcing my eyes to stay open. I do not want to drift away into this alternate world of dreams just yet. Not without being able to clear my head. Besides, I know that, when I close my eyes, I will suddenly be wide awake again.
The person who has taken over my entire mind is meanwhile sleeping in the bed next to mine. His steady breathing seems to be lulling me into sleep, but I’m fighting the exhaustion that has taken over my body. I need to get him out of my mind first, anyway. It will not do to sleep another night filled with dreams about him.
I want to talk about him, but I can’t. I can’t seem to find the words. I mean, there are like hundreds, no thousands, or even ten thousands of words in my head about him, but they all seem so insufficient. I cannot describe what is really in my head, in my heart. Because how could I describe him to others who have not seen him?
I have no way to capture in words the exact feeling I get when he smiles or how his smile can light up a whole day. It is impossible to express in words the lively sparkle in his eyes when he talks about something he loves. I cannot begin to tell you how the almost unnoticeable squinting of his eyes when he laughs can make me melt.
And that’s just the outside. Even though it is already hard to make someone understand about his looks, his personality is even more impossible to describe. Because what words would be good enough to use for something as pure and caring as him? A personality that is a million times more pretty than any outside feature could ever be.
That is mostly what makes him this irresistible to me. There are so many guys with good looks. If you scan the world population, you will probably find that at least two boys out of three will be good-looking. Sadly enough, looks come in a package deal together with personality and if you scan that same world population again, you’ll find that only one out of ten boys is left and that half of those are gay.
Heh.. Silly how I can be captivated by him even after all these years. I’ve known him for what? Ten years now? Since we were young I have been by his side. I’ve seen him grow up from a little boy to a man, growing together with him, even though he spent the last seven years of that journey in Korea.
Yet now he’s back and somehow I’m the first person he came to after visiting his parents. Somehow I’m the one he chose to spend the first night back in China with. Funny how that makes me feel so warm, so happy, so..unwilling to sleep. I want to turn around and look at him, stare at him for the rest of the night so that tomorrow, when he leaves again, I will have the picture of him burned into my memory.
How sad is it that he has to go again already tomorrow morning? He will be up in no time and I will be left behind alone like every other ti--
When something touched her shoulder, she felt fear jolting through her body and she gasped for air in surprise. She pushed the paper from her bed and struggled to get up in her attempt to get be able to look behind her as fast as she could. Two amazingly captivating eyes caught hers and caused her to sigh deeply in relief when she recognized them.
“Oh, it’s you.” she said, relaxing her tensed muscles and putting the pen on her night table. “I’m sorry if I woke you up.” She brushed her hair behind her ears in a futile attempt to stop the trembling of her hands, but was surprised again as he gently took them in his.
“No, it’s okay, you didn’t wake me, I woke up by myself.” he replied. “But why are you still up? It’s four in the morning. Is something wrong?” His words made her feel guilty, even though she didn’t know why. He was just asking a question, wasn’t he? In the back of her mind she thanked the Gods that the paper she had been writing on, now lay somewhere under the bed, unnoticed by him.
“I-I’m fine.” she said, silently cursing the fact that she stuttered now, out of all times. Then, without really realizing it, she blurted out more words. “I missed you so much, Geng. You don’t know how happy I was to hear you on the phone and then you even came by. It was so hard for me to hear about your troubles in Korea without being able to help you. After your debut, I even sent that Heechul person a mail that if he dared to let anything happen to you, I would personally find and kill him. And now you’re here, but you’ll be gone again tomorrow. Where does that l-”
He cut off her words by smiling. All the words that were supposed to come out after that, simply disappeared from her mind as she looked at his smile, then let her eyes wander upwards to meet his gaze, before sighing. He sat down on the edge of her bed and opened his arms a little. She gladly moved closer to let him hug her. When she felt his warmth surround her, she was finally able to fully relax.
“You still talk way too much, Da Xia.” he said. “I guess some things never change.” His soft chuckle made a smile appear on her face as well. “I missed you too and I thought about you a lot. I can’t believe you actually threatened Heechul and got away with it, but now I know at least why he would always frown at the very mention of your name. If I could, I would stay here another day, or a whole year, but we both know it’s not up to me. Staying up late tiring yourself won’t change that. You should really sleep now.”
She sighed again, but knew he was right. A little sad, she pulled out of his embrace and lay down on her bed, looking up at him as she did. He smiled and leaned a little closer to give her a kiss on her forehead. He caressed her cheek with his fingers for a moment. As she looked at him, she already felt her eyes close and soon she was taken to the land of dreams.
She never knew how Hangeng got up from the bed only to crouch down and take the paper out from under the bed to read it. When he finished, he took the pen and added some words to what was already written on the paper. He then carefully folded it and put it on her night table, together with the pen.
Only when waking up would she notice that he had slid under the blanket next to her and put his arms around her. Only after spending over four hours in his arms, would she notice the smile on his face. Only when he was long gone would she pick up the paper again to find the words he had secretly written to her.
No matter where I am, you’re in my heart, therefore, you will never be alone.
Characters: Hangeng, OC
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.278
Summary: Sometimes no words are sufficient enough to say what you feel inside.
A/N: A story written quite a while ago again, but one that has a rather special feel for me. I noticed many people seemed to like this one, so I figured it could not be left out from my LJ. So here it is! ^.^
- - - - -
It’s silent. It should be. The clock tells me it’s almost four in the morning, yet I cannot get myself to sleep. I write while forcing my eyes to stay open. I do not want to drift away into this alternate world of dreams just yet. Not without being able to clear my head. Besides, I know that, when I close my eyes, I will suddenly be wide awake again.
The person who has taken over my entire mind is meanwhile sleeping in the bed next to mine. His steady breathing seems to be lulling me into sleep, but I’m fighting the exhaustion that has taken over my body. I need to get him out of my mind first, anyway. It will not do to sleep another night filled with dreams about him.
I want to talk about him, but I can’t. I can’t seem to find the words. I mean, there are like hundreds, no thousands, or even ten thousands of words in my head about him, but they all seem so insufficient. I cannot describe what is really in my head, in my heart. Because how could I describe him to others who have not seen him?
I have no way to capture in words the exact feeling I get when he smiles or how his smile can light up a whole day. It is impossible to express in words the lively sparkle in his eyes when he talks about something he loves. I cannot begin to tell you how the almost unnoticeable squinting of his eyes when he laughs can make me melt.
And that’s just the outside. Even though it is already hard to make someone understand about his looks, his personality is even more impossible to describe. Because what words would be good enough to use for something as pure and caring as him? A personality that is a million times more pretty than any outside feature could ever be.
That is mostly what makes him this irresistible to me. There are so many guys with good looks. If you scan the world population, you will probably find that at least two boys out of three will be good-looking. Sadly enough, looks come in a package deal together with personality and if you scan that same world population again, you’ll find that only one out of ten boys is left and that half of those are gay.
Heh.. Silly how I can be captivated by him even after all these years. I’ve known him for what? Ten years now? Since we were young I have been by his side. I’ve seen him grow up from a little boy to a man, growing together with him, even though he spent the last seven years of that journey in Korea.
Yet now he’s back and somehow I’m the first person he came to after visiting his parents. Somehow I’m the one he chose to spend the first night back in China with. Funny how that makes me feel so warm, so happy, so..unwilling to sleep. I want to turn around and look at him, stare at him for the rest of the night so that tomorrow, when he leaves again, I will have the picture of him burned into my memory.
How sad is it that he has to go again already tomorrow morning? He will be up in no time and I will be left behind alone like every other ti--
When something touched her shoulder, she felt fear jolting through her body and she gasped for air in surprise. She pushed the paper from her bed and struggled to get up in her attempt to get be able to look behind her as fast as she could. Two amazingly captivating eyes caught hers and caused her to sigh deeply in relief when she recognized them.
“Oh, it’s you.” she said, relaxing her tensed muscles and putting the pen on her night table. “I’m sorry if I woke you up.” She brushed her hair behind her ears in a futile attempt to stop the trembling of her hands, but was surprised again as he gently took them in his.
“No, it’s okay, you didn’t wake me, I woke up by myself.” he replied. “But why are you still up? It’s four in the morning. Is something wrong?” His words made her feel guilty, even though she didn’t know why. He was just asking a question, wasn’t he? In the back of her mind she thanked the Gods that the paper she had been writing on, now lay somewhere under the bed, unnoticed by him.
“I-I’m fine.” she said, silently cursing the fact that she stuttered now, out of all times. Then, without really realizing it, she blurted out more words. “I missed you so much, Geng. You don’t know how happy I was to hear you on the phone and then you even came by. It was so hard for me to hear about your troubles in Korea without being able to help you. After your debut, I even sent that Heechul person a mail that if he dared to let anything happen to you, I would personally find and kill him. And now you’re here, but you’ll be gone again tomorrow. Where does that l-”
He cut off her words by smiling. All the words that were supposed to come out after that, simply disappeared from her mind as she looked at his smile, then let her eyes wander upwards to meet his gaze, before sighing. He sat down on the edge of her bed and opened his arms a little. She gladly moved closer to let him hug her. When she felt his warmth surround her, she was finally able to fully relax.
“You still talk way too much, Da Xia.” he said. “I guess some things never change.” His soft chuckle made a smile appear on her face as well. “I missed you too and I thought about you a lot. I can’t believe you actually threatened Heechul and got away with it, but now I know at least why he would always frown at the very mention of your name. If I could, I would stay here another day, or a whole year, but we both know it’s not up to me. Staying up late tiring yourself won’t change that. You should really sleep now.”
She sighed again, but knew he was right. A little sad, she pulled out of his embrace and lay down on her bed, looking up at him as she did. He smiled and leaned a little closer to give her a kiss on her forehead. He caressed her cheek with his fingers for a moment. As she looked at him, she already felt her eyes close and soon she was taken to the land of dreams.
She never knew how Hangeng got up from the bed only to crouch down and take the paper out from under the bed to read it. When he finished, he took the pen and added some words to what was already written on the paper. He then carefully folded it and put it on her night table, together with the pen.
Only when waking up would she notice that he had slid under the blanket next to her and put his arms around her. Only after spending over four hours in his arms, would she notice the smile on his face. Only when he was long gone would she pick up the paper again to find the words he had secretly written to her.
No matter where I am, you’re in my heart, therefore, you will never be alone.
Wednesday, 24 August 2011
Fic Challenge - 034; Acceptance [3/100]
Title: Acceptance
Characters: Hankyung/Kibum
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.179
Summary: It's four in the morning, but that doesn't keep him from calling.
A/N: Started two days before posting, finished on paper because I write better then.
- - - - -
He curses a few very dirty swearing words and almost throws his alarm clock off his night table in his struggle to find the ringing phone lying around somewhere on the thing. When his fingers finally touch the cold metal, he quickly grabs the phone and brings it closer to his face, squinting his eyes as he tries to see who’s calling. The number is set private, however, so he just presses the green button and puts the phone next to his ear, letting out another heartfelt curse as he does so.
“This better be important or you’ll be dead meat once I get up at a decent hour.” he grumbles into the receiver, intend on skinning the caller alive if he or she is calling for no reason at all. There’s a short silence on the other side, and he immediately suspects the person to just be playing a prank on him, but right before he can hang up again, someone finally speaks.
“Hyung..” It sounds, rather soft and it’s said in such a vulnerable way that the next insult dies in his throat, halfway getting out of his mouth. The voice is strangely familiar, but he can’t put a finger on it the first few seconds. It is when there’s a soft intake of breath on the other side that he suddenly realises who he’s talking to. He sits up in surprise and lets his mind repeat the one word spoken by the familiar voice over and over.
“Kibum..” he says, not really believing himself that it’s really his silent Korean friend, even though it’s unmistakeable. His thoughts drift back to the last time he talked to the guy and he realises that was a long time ago. Way too long, really, but what could either of them do about that? It had been out of both their hands -the decision to keep in contact or not- and with Kibum going back to the US for a while, calling had become an expensive joke anyway. Yet here he is, on the phone with Kibum, who he hasn’t talked to for months.
“I had to call you during the night.” the younger suddenly speaks, seemingly wanting to erase the bad mood, trying to apologise for waking him up without really apologising. “To make sure no one would know, to make sure it wouldn’t get you in trouble.” There is a short silence in which Hangeng tries hard to find the words to say ‘it’s okay’ and Kibum understands even with nothing but silence, because it’s Kibum and he has never needed a lot of words.
“So I heard you’re not going back anymore, hyung.” he then continues on a more casual note, obviously dismissing the previous subject of the conversation. There’s a slight crackle on the line that tells Hangeng the two of them are really far apart. He swallows, but knows there’s no denying this fact. After all; he IS never going to go back. Not to Super Junior and not to Korea. He doesn’t know if it’s his stupidity or the company’s, but he lost his chance to go back the moment he got on the plane back to China.
When he opens his mouth to speak, he is surprised himself at how easily the foreign but familiar language rolls out, albeit as nothing more than a whisper. “I’m sorry.” The silence that follows would be deafening if not for the never ending crackle. Slowly he finds himself remembering how easy it has always been - lapsing into silence while talking to Kibum. But he remembers more than just that. Like the many times he would be up late with the other sleeping against his shoulder or on his lap. He remembers so many little things that he and Kibum shared without anyone else ever knowing about them -not even Heechul- and despite it being four in the morning and having been called out of bed, he is completely awake still by the time the younger speaks again.
“I know.” There are so many emotions conveyed through the younger’s voice that Hangeng feels a lump rise in his throat, making him unable to speak. There’s sadness, most of all, because Kibum knows what the apology means and knows that it’s going to take a long time to adjust, but there’s also a tad bit of happiness for the other’s wellbeing, some understanding and some love, but in the end, he figures the bunch of emotions all bend down to one thing; acceptance. He suddenly realises that Kibum already knew the answer to the unasked question, but simply wanted to hear it from Hangeng himself. At a loss of what to reply to that, he merely waits on the next topic Kibum wants to bring up. He doesn’t need to wait long.
“Heechul..”
He feels his insides clench at the mention of that name and quickly speaks before Kibum can continue. “Will do fine. He’s a grown up man. He’ll survive.” But even as the words leave his mouth, he knows they’re not very true. Sure Heechul might cope, but there’s no way it’s going to happen without some many litres of alcohol involved. He closes his eyes and clenches his teeth, trying to bite the pain away. If anything, it’s going to be hard to keep his friends out of his thoughts to not feel guilty. “I trust you to take care of him, Bummie.” he then mumbles.
There’s a sigh on the other end and the silence spreads out a little longer, before Kibum’s slightly rough voice breaks through it once again. “I will. But call him, hyung. A lot.” It is then that Hangeng realises it is always the silent ones who know the most, but he doesn’t get time to express those thoughts into words as Kibum continues. “And sleep more, hyung. You sound like your still partly in dreamland.”
“Sleepy? At four thirty in the morning? How could that be?” he retorts, his voice layered with sarcasm and the obvious blame.
“What are you still doing up at this hour anyway? Go to sleep.” Kibum says, but there’s a joking tone in his voice, that sounds so light and feels so foreign to him, that he almost finds himself breaking down into tears in the middle of his bed. Yet he composes himself right in time to catch the “Goodnight” and the “Sweet dreams.” the other wishes him, and with that, the line is disconnected.
He stares at the phone in his hand until the light goes out and then he keeps staring, his mind wrapping itself around the idea that it might just as well be one of the very last conversations he’ll have with the younger one for a while. After a while, he pushes away the images of past days, happier days, and finally settles himself back onto the mattress, letting his head sink away in the feathery pillows. It was, but it isn’t anymore, and all he can do is accept that fact, because there’s no going back.
Characters: Hankyung/Kibum
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1.179
Summary: It's four in the morning, but that doesn't keep him from calling.
A/N: Started two days before posting, finished on paper because I write better then.
- - - - -
He curses a few very dirty swearing words and almost throws his alarm clock off his night table in his struggle to find the ringing phone lying around somewhere on the thing. When his fingers finally touch the cold metal, he quickly grabs the phone and brings it closer to his face, squinting his eyes as he tries to see who’s calling. The number is set private, however, so he just presses the green button and puts the phone next to his ear, letting out another heartfelt curse as he does so.
“This better be important or you’ll be dead meat once I get up at a decent hour.” he grumbles into the receiver, intend on skinning the caller alive if he or she is calling for no reason at all. There’s a short silence on the other side, and he immediately suspects the person to just be playing a prank on him, but right before he can hang up again, someone finally speaks.
“Hyung..” It sounds, rather soft and it’s said in such a vulnerable way that the next insult dies in his throat, halfway getting out of his mouth. The voice is strangely familiar, but he can’t put a finger on it the first few seconds. It is when there’s a soft intake of breath on the other side that he suddenly realises who he’s talking to. He sits up in surprise and lets his mind repeat the one word spoken by the familiar voice over and over.
“Kibum..” he says, not really believing himself that it’s really his silent Korean friend, even though it’s unmistakeable. His thoughts drift back to the last time he talked to the guy and he realises that was a long time ago. Way too long, really, but what could either of them do about that? It had been out of both their hands -the decision to keep in contact or not- and with Kibum going back to the US for a while, calling had become an expensive joke anyway. Yet here he is, on the phone with Kibum, who he hasn’t talked to for months.
“I had to call you during the night.” the younger suddenly speaks, seemingly wanting to erase the bad mood, trying to apologise for waking him up without really apologising. “To make sure no one would know, to make sure it wouldn’t get you in trouble.” There is a short silence in which Hangeng tries hard to find the words to say ‘it’s okay’ and Kibum understands even with nothing but silence, because it’s Kibum and he has never needed a lot of words.
“So I heard you’re not going back anymore, hyung.” he then continues on a more casual note, obviously dismissing the previous subject of the conversation. There’s a slight crackle on the line that tells Hangeng the two of them are really far apart. He swallows, but knows there’s no denying this fact. After all; he IS never going to go back. Not to Super Junior and not to Korea. He doesn’t know if it’s his stupidity or the company’s, but he lost his chance to go back the moment he got on the plane back to China.
When he opens his mouth to speak, he is surprised himself at how easily the foreign but familiar language rolls out, albeit as nothing more than a whisper. “I’m sorry.” The silence that follows would be deafening if not for the never ending crackle. Slowly he finds himself remembering how easy it has always been - lapsing into silence while talking to Kibum. But he remembers more than just that. Like the many times he would be up late with the other sleeping against his shoulder or on his lap. He remembers so many little things that he and Kibum shared without anyone else ever knowing about them -not even Heechul- and despite it being four in the morning and having been called out of bed, he is completely awake still by the time the younger speaks again.
“I know.” There are so many emotions conveyed through the younger’s voice that Hangeng feels a lump rise in his throat, making him unable to speak. There’s sadness, most of all, because Kibum knows what the apology means and knows that it’s going to take a long time to adjust, but there’s also a tad bit of happiness for the other’s wellbeing, some understanding and some love, but in the end, he figures the bunch of emotions all bend down to one thing; acceptance. He suddenly realises that Kibum already knew the answer to the unasked question, but simply wanted to hear it from Hangeng himself. At a loss of what to reply to that, he merely waits on the next topic Kibum wants to bring up. He doesn’t need to wait long.
“Heechul..”
He feels his insides clench at the mention of that name and quickly speaks before Kibum can continue. “Will do fine. He’s a grown up man. He’ll survive.” But even as the words leave his mouth, he knows they’re not very true. Sure Heechul might cope, but there’s no way it’s going to happen without some many litres of alcohol involved. He closes his eyes and clenches his teeth, trying to bite the pain away. If anything, it’s going to be hard to keep his friends out of his thoughts to not feel guilty. “I trust you to take care of him, Bummie.” he then mumbles.
There’s a sigh on the other end and the silence spreads out a little longer, before Kibum’s slightly rough voice breaks through it once again. “I will. But call him, hyung. A lot.” It is then that Hangeng realises it is always the silent ones who know the most, but he doesn’t get time to express those thoughts into words as Kibum continues. “And sleep more, hyung. You sound like your still partly in dreamland.”
“Sleepy? At four thirty in the morning? How could that be?” he retorts, his voice layered with sarcasm and the obvious blame.
“What are you still doing up at this hour anyway? Go to sleep.” Kibum says, but there’s a joking tone in his voice, that sounds so light and feels so foreign to him, that he almost finds himself breaking down into tears in the middle of his bed. Yet he composes himself right in time to catch the “Goodnight” and the “Sweet dreams.” the other wishes him, and with that, the line is disconnected.
He stares at the phone in his hand until the light goes out and then he keeps staring, his mind wrapping itself around the idea that it might just as well be one of the very last conversations he’ll have with the younger one for a while. After a while, he pushes away the images of past days, happier days, and finally settles himself back onto the mattress, letting his head sink away in the feathery pillows. It was, but it isn’t anymore, and all he can do is accept that fact, because there’s no going back.
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